I Have A Birthday Every Year

Today is my birthday. I'm not looking for attention just getting it out there that I have kind of weird emotional feelings towards this day. When I was a kid so many people made me feel special that I just thought it would always be like that. Then I got to middle and high school and beyond and didn't have friends so I stopped celebrating and worked really hard to teach myself that I didn't care until I believed it. As I got older it started hurting that people just didn't care. I would've loved a 21st or 25th or 30th birthday celebration or just a group to celebrate any number of them between but it didn't happen. I am thankful for my life and that I'm still young enough to think maybe next year. I would also like to reach a point where I say its ok, I don't need that and believe it. Now that I've wrote my feelings and accept that I don't yet fully appreciate how fortunate I am, I am off to swim with my daughter and nephews and niece and that'll be good enough for me.