I Hate Men Who Hit Women

Men who hit women?
If most men are reared by their mum. If they have spent so much time at home and at kindergarten with females, why do they behave this way?

They are shown life through their mum’s eyes. She is their life teacher, does she not show him how to treat other boys/girls.

Why so, are the boys trying to displease their mother and trying to impress other males.

Do single mothers rear boys that are more violent? Those that did not have a stable dad as a role model?

We can’t leave the court system to eradicate violence, it will never happen.

Mothers please teach your boys to respect you and maybe they will respect the rest of us.

This page is a permanent link to the reply below and its nested replies. See all post replies »

JakeShade · 61-69, M

SoFine...

A little more serious here. The only men I know to hit women were doing it out of their own inneffectual rage and probably shame.

I'm not wanting to "blame the victim" at all here, but some of those men watched their *fathers* be abused (usually only verbally) by their *mothers*... and probably were the victims of the same wicked tongue themselves. Of course, it was as likely as not that *their* fathers probably were vicious to them or *their* mothers!

The cycle of abuse is hard to stop. I made the decision about the time my daughters were 2 and 4 to break the cycle of abuse their mother had been part of, which was "matrilineal".

Their mother fought viciously with *her* mother (who fought viciously with *her* mother)... when she (openly, in front of me) threatened to "slap your faces" to my daughters, I vowed I would do all I could to keep her from passing that on down.

We were divorced about 2 years later and I was the primary parent/caregiver after that (and before)... it cost me a lot financially and professionally (as many women accept as single parents) to do this, but it is well worth it. My younger daughter has a 4 year old daughter now and I have not seen her even come *close* to using verbal (or threats of physical) abuse toward her. Both daughters have managed to become adults without (*much*) fighting with their own mother, though both all but disowned their grandmother.

So, not to move the focus away from male violence against women (I know and agree that it is *much* more common), I want to present the simple fact of the cycle of abuse through generations which may be "handed down" cross-gender or same-gender...

I'm just thankful that I did not have the background or idea that threatening my (ex) wife with violence to curb her violent threats toward our children was a good idea. I've seen that failure as well!