How much money should you spend on a first date?
I actually went out with a woman the other day and we bought coffees then went to sit in a park to chat for a cpl of hours. I paid for the coffees (like $12 total for both).
First dates are supposed to be simple, so coffee and park casual situation is great. You can spend the time to assess the other person with no financial pressures. If I got to go on more dates that once every 5 yrs it'd be the go-to.
Anyway I got the impression she was angling to get sex basically straight away from her attitude and approach and near the end she invited me back to her house (a brand new one she had built apparently).
I've msg'd her since and basically said I need time to think on it as I found the experience very confronting being my first real date in close to 5 yrs. Not even really a 'date' I guess - just a 'see what we think of each other in person' catch-up.
I didn't hold hands with her, but we had a quick hug at the end when we both had to leave because of things we actually had to do (which was good as it put a time limit in place).
Would I see her again? I don't know. I haven't been on dates with anyone in years, and to get hints that it's leading to sex on the first meetup is not in my playbook as any sort of 'safe' interaction. She was wearing a lot of expensive bling too which sort of put me off.
Being very scared of sex and intimacy and being neuro-atypical plus demi-sexual means without a good connection I can't do sex in any way that would be enjoyable.
In the end, I was getting the 'ick' (and a sore bum from sitting on an aluminium park bench for ages).
First dates are supposed to be simple, so coffee and park casual situation is great. You can spend the time to assess the other person with no financial pressures. If I got to go on more dates that once every 5 yrs it'd be the go-to.
Anyway I got the impression she was angling to get sex basically straight away from her attitude and approach and near the end she invited me back to her house (a brand new one she had built apparently).
I've msg'd her since and basically said I need time to think on it as I found the experience very confronting being my first real date in close to 5 yrs. Not even really a 'date' I guess - just a 'see what we think of each other in person' catch-up.
I didn't hold hands with her, but we had a quick hug at the end when we both had to leave because of things we actually had to do (which was good as it put a time limit in place).
Would I see her again? I don't know. I haven't been on dates with anyone in years, and to get hints that it's leading to sex on the first meetup is not in my playbook as any sort of 'safe' interaction. She was wearing a lot of expensive bling too which sort of put me off.
Being very scared of sex and intimacy and being neuro-atypical plus demi-sexual means without a good connection I can't do sex in any way that would be enjoyable.
In the end, I was getting the 'ick' (and a sore bum from sitting on an aluminium park bench for ages).
