Late Summer Bank Holiday Monday

A public summer holiday for all residents of England, Wales and Northern Ireland . . but not Scotland where the irony of summer in August is all too obvious 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

Traditionally a day when the hardworking employees of our esteemed banking sector lay down their quill pens and take a well deserved rest from their selfless labours.

Customarily celebrated by middle-aged men who reserve the right to make as much noise as they like with lawnmowers and powertools, but complain when our children want to play in their own garden 😕 The unbaffled engines of hobby motorbikes are left idling for half an hour in the street and the air turns blue with exhaust fumes. The late summer sky is criss-crossed with noisy light aircraft, para-gliders, etc, all clamouring for attention.

And if I were still living in the countryside, no doubt some public-spirited soul would round off this happy occasion by illegally burning chipboard on "his land" and driving everybody back indoors🔥