Can someone be gay and not know it?

It is an interesting question - is being gay an intrinstic property or defined by action? And if not by action what is being gay actually mean? If I pick another descriptor - say muscian - is someone a musician if they have never played an instrument (or sang or composed something)? Most people would say not, no matter how musical they might be. So it could be argued that being gay is something that happens as a result of action , but counter to that you could argue that in finding a member of the same sex attractive makes them gay - this surely requires no action - but not every hetero person finds every member of the opposite sex attractive either - what if they just haven't come across one they do find attractive?

So someone presumably could be homophobic (not racist!) but then have latent gay tendancies themselves. In fact this can happen when a person feels that they can't be gay (for societal reasons) and develops an unreasonable hatred partly because of their own feelings for themselves.