I Love Being A Gay Sissy

My Life Is A Sham!... I'm 50 years old and a totally gay, cock-loving, submissive, pink sissy pantyboy in private. I work for a military contractor and am surrounded by military or ex-military men. I can't "come out" at work as I'd more than likely lose a 6 figure job that I love doing as none of the "Macho Married Men" would accept working with or for a sissy faggot. None of my family knows and most of them would seriously not approve of my being gay. I've lived most of my life in the closet and often wonder if people aren't talking about it behind my back, I've never heard any inkling of this, nor has anyone even intimated that I might be gay but I have to wonder, none of them has ever seen me with a "girlfriend" or a "boyfriend" for that matter, are they blind, do they think i'm asexual? I'm very "straight acting" and looking, if you were to see me in the "normal daily world" you would never think i'm wearing pretty pink panties under my guy clothes and wishing i could have my lips, toe and fingernails all painted in pretty sissy pink for anyone to see :) I've lived alone most of my adult life and have never been in a "committed relationship", this is a very lonely life but I guess it's the life I've chosen to live. I wish that I could flauntingly explode out of my closet and be accepted by co-workers, friends and family alike but pretty much know that will never happen. So where do I go from here? do I spend the rest of my life hiding who I truly am from everyone just to keep the comfortable status quo going? Isn't it about time I start to question where I've been and where I'm going? Do I give up everything I know and love so I can be who I was meant to be? Oh so many questions and very few answers!

I'm not complaining but just need to vent a little.

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sissypolly

i have thought about this same question many times so this is ow i have justified it to myself which works for me. i have worked for the same company for 12 years and known many of the other employees for all of this time. i don't lye to them about me being a sissy although i don't tell them either so what do i do of an evening maybe i watch tv have a friend over or go out to meet friends the thing is that is what i would tell people if asked whether I'm dressed as a male or a sissy for these activities i never discus what i am wearing or go into to much detail as to what i was doing. so just because its thought I'm dressed as a man and have been with a woman when in fact i have been dressed as polly the sissy slut and been with another sissy or guy thats not actually my problem and why should i give away personal details like that anyway as know body else does. this may not work for you but i see no reason why you have to justify yourself to anybody your private life is just that private. although I'm always happy to hear what other naughty sissy sluts are up to

spjennifer · 61-69, T

Thank you for your thoughts sissypolly, i agree we shouldn't have to hide our true selves and on occasion when i can get away with it, i sort of reveal a little of my true sissy self but no one ever picks up on it as they think i'm just joking... I have a reputation for having a pretty sick/twisted sense of humour so when I tell them to watch out that i'm wearing my pretty pink sissy panties today, none of them take me seriously, little do they know that i'm telling the truth, they just tell me "i'm one twisted fucker" which is also somewhat true :)