What do you think of when you think of femininity?

@Miram totally fair enough. I think I've just always been told I'm too girly and people can't take me seriously because of that

@YaGirlSara attributes like assertiveness, being driven, confidence...they can all be feminine too

It sounds more like the people you talk about have twisted definition of femininity.

You may want to explore yours independently from theirs.

@Miram since ancient times, femininity has been equated with fertility, and it’s been the women who’ve taken the perilous and dangerous role of continuing our species. In modern times; in the female personality, courage, endurance, and confidence still persist. To say nothing of enduring the pain of childbirth!
But the girly part of femininity is equally legitimate, because typically that’s the part that the male responds to, and of course male arousal is necessary for the whole thing to work.
My wife and I have a Female Led Relationship. She’s an attorney and is smart, strong, confident and forceful. While she’s at work every day I stay home and do housekeeping and laundry, in somewhat of a role reversal by modern standards.
As might be expected, she’s acquired some masculine attitudes, and I’ve become more girlish.