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What is toxic femininity ?

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No idea.

Wait...hang on.

I read this

[i]https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/sex-sexuality-and-romance/201908/toxic-femininity[/i]

which explains it as a woman choosing to try to live up to being "feminine" even when it hurts them/is not what's best for them/etc.

I'm not going to delve more deeply into it, but it seems just like a special phrase for a well-known general phenomenon: attempting to live up to ideal or other external standards to one's own detriment.