I'm not going back to rehab tomorrow.

I started going because a close friend whom I love dearly motivated me to. Since then, I've reduced my drinking tremendously.

That friend is gone now and my motivation went with them. Still, I kept going.

But if I slip up even a little, the provider there presses me about going to inpatient treatment and stares at me awkwardly while I'm expected to come up with a reason not to go. It makes me feel awkward and guilty, like the progress I've made isn't good enough.

And it's progress made while the truth is that, frankly, I don't care anymore. I am not motivated to keep going to rehab but I kept going, and they want me to commit even more? No. If what I've done isn't good enough then I guess I'm just not good enough.

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MyMonstersAreReal · F

The progress you have made is amazing and you should be so proud of what you have done so far. Addiction is hard. Recovery is hard. Every day is a fight. You show up. You fight. Slips are going to happen it doesn’t mean what you have not done isn’t good progress. I really wish you would keep going. Even though your friend isn’t here. They believed in you. I believe in you. You should believe in yourself. 🤗

Nightwings · F

You have made immense progress since we met each other. You are so much more mindful about your health now, you are capable of staying sober for a really long period at a time, in fact I think you could just quit 100% right now if you wanted to. I think the therapist in the rehab facility sees this in you as well, and she has dedicated her life to helping people get sober right, so she sees that you are capable of doing it, hence wants to make it happen for you. She tells you to go inpatient and commit 100% because that's what they do you know, they get people 100% off alcohol. It's a once in a lifetime decision, and she wants you to make it right now because that's why people come to the facility. If you are not ready to do it, that doesn't make you a bad person ok, and it doesn't mean you are not capable. It is your life, it is your decision. You do it for yourself when you do it, and I'm completely sure you're going to do it one day. That day doesn't have to be today. Get in the right mindset, think about what you want, instead of what other people want for you. Keep in touch with your physical doctor, get a general blood test now and then, make sure you stay safe. The goal is not to quit drinking and first then start your life, like we talked about; the goal is to improve in terms of how much you care for yourself, and your physical and mental well-being. You have other things going on at the same time as the alcohol addiction which deserve attention too, like you suffer from depression. That needs fixing too. You have a lot of work to do for yourself going forward and the therapist in the rehab center is not there for all that, her only job is to get people sober right now. I suggest you try again a general therapist for the mental health, to discuss your various struggles all together, rather than as seperate issues ok? I love you. You're a great person and did a lot of work on yourself already, you can be proud friend. 💚🍃

SinlessOnslaught · M

@Nightwings 💙

kodiac · 26-30, M

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