At the bank, I told the cashier, “I’d like to open a joint checking account please.” “OK; with whom?” “Whoever has lots of money!”
If I ever win the lottery, I’m going to share it everyone on here… Not the money. I’m only going to tell everyone I won!
So, I’m in the market for a well equipped espresso machine for the house. Started watching a YouTube review by this guy and was all into the pros…..and cons of the features until I noticed he wears two watches. One on each wrist.. WTH?! Needles to say, espresso machine review completely side tracked me now
Them: ‘so, are you seeing anyone right now?!’ Me: ‘Like dating, a therapist, hallucinations?’ Them: ‘Nevermind.’
