I Have Anger Management Issues
I try counting to ten, like my counselor suggests, but I really only use that time to pick where I'm going to punch someone. They're usually laid out by the time I get to 8.
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annie616pop · 26-30, F
@HellaBrooksy
Hmm, did you change your name from 'Brooksy' to 'HellaBrooksy'? If so, it appears that the visit from the clown is doing some good because you are concerned about managing anger. Good for you!
While I obviously don't know your particular circumstance let me share what one of my martial art instructors imparted a few years back on the subject of anger at an advanced black belt class.
"Anger or it's brother, 'rage,' has more to do with yourself and how you perceive the situation than the situation itself. Anger at a rage level is a statement: 'this threatens me so much I want to kill it, totally eradicate it so it never comes around to threaten or disturb me ever again!' This is the reactive state of a child. Since you all have been trained with numerous ways to dispatch someone quickly and efficiently you can see the problem you are going to have if you let this child rule your behavior.
It's perfectly normal to feel angry if you feel like you or others you care about have been threatened, mistreated or wronged. You might have heard of the advice to 'take a deep breath and count to ten.' It's excellent advice to apply if you are normally a calm person. It's not such good advice if you find yourself in a pattern of responding to conflict or irritation with anger or rage. Why? Because the technique has not taught you what you really ought to be working with....and that is developing the presence of a calm center, a thinking and observing center, no matter what the stimulus might be. In other words seeking to understand who you are first versus analyzing or blaming situations or people outside of you.
A warrior with such a center has a better chance of getting through moments of danger, living longer, and with less stress. This is something your parents and kin know as Marines. This is something we will work on this week and hopefully you will continue working on the rest of your life."
*end*
My only other thought besides this, HellaB, is that if you have a son, then it is your nature that the kid picks up on and most likely will emulate into his adolescence and adulthood. Something to think about, no?
Hmm, did you change your name from 'Brooksy' to 'HellaBrooksy'? If so, it appears that the visit from the clown is doing some good because you are concerned about managing anger. Good for you!
While I obviously don't know your particular circumstance let me share what one of my martial art instructors imparted a few years back on the subject of anger at an advanced black belt class.
"Anger or it's brother, 'rage,' has more to do with yourself and how you perceive the situation than the situation itself. Anger at a rage level is a statement: 'this threatens me so much I want to kill it, totally eradicate it so it never comes around to threaten or disturb me ever again!' This is the reactive state of a child. Since you all have been trained with numerous ways to dispatch someone quickly and efficiently you can see the problem you are going to have if you let this child rule your behavior.
It's perfectly normal to feel angry if you feel like you or others you care about have been threatened, mistreated or wronged. You might have heard of the advice to 'take a deep breath and count to ten.' It's excellent advice to apply if you are normally a calm person. It's not such good advice if you find yourself in a pattern of responding to conflict or irritation with anger or rage. Why? Because the technique has not taught you what you really ought to be working with....and that is developing the presence of a calm center, a thinking and observing center, no matter what the stimulus might be. In other words seeking to understand who you are first versus analyzing or blaming situations or people outside of you.
A warrior with such a center has a better chance of getting through moments of danger, living longer, and with less stress. This is something your parents and kin know as Marines. This is something we will work on this week and hopefully you will continue working on the rest of your life."
*end*
My only other thought besides this, HellaB, is that if you have a son, then it is your nature that the kid picks up on and most likely will emulate into his adolescence and adulthood. Something to think about, no?