I Want To Write My Random Thoughts And Feelings
Where do great thoughts begin? Where are we supposed to start (or finish) when trying to describe something as intricate as a thought or a feeling? Is it even possible to describe our internal states without disrupting and distorting them along the way?
We can use all the right words in all the right ways to describe a particular thought or idea we have within us, and yet it rarely ever feels (at least to me), as if it has been accurately portrayed or put across in the way that I want, especially when I reflect on it afterwards. This usually deters me from finishing the things I want to write about, as I become quickly aware of the fact that my internal states are slowly being distorted by the very act of me describing them. And yet, what choice do we have but to use words?
By way of convenience and habit, and the fact we have little else, words are about the only thing we can fall back on when we want to communicate and translate our ideas to the world. Of course there are also other mediums people use for self-expression: things like art, drama, and visual story-telling - but even these have their limitations and shortcomings to some extent. Maybe I demand and expect too much from myself and language in general.
I care about accuracy so much and focus on it in the way that I do because I'm of the opinion that when something is put across in an extremely genuine and sincere manner it can actually be felt and picked up in a strong way. I think there's obviously a difference between something that took a few seconds or minutes to write, vs. something that took several hours, or even a few days to complete. If we care about what we're doing, we will insist upon taking as long as we need to. In any other case, we will press buttons only because those buttons do something, and not to bring about something that will ultimately make people think and feel.
It's easy to just use words for a particular purpose or outcome in an almost superficial "means-to-an-end" kind of way, but it isn't quite so easy to consciously reflect on our words as we convey them, and to truly dive deep into their meaning and their intent as they arise within our minds. Conscious examination of ourselves expends our time and our energy - resources which we are taught and trained by our environment to channel into everyday activities and routines instead - the so-called "important" things about life; the things which generate fast and easy results for us; the things that make us comfortable, secure, and significant.
Human civilization has (sadly) become extremely survival-based in the way that it operates, and a lot of we do, say, and believe, is really just about staying afloat, about getting from A to B in the shortest, most productive way we can; gotta do this to get that, gotta be first in line, gotta get what's mine, etc.
Meh, whatever.
We can use all the right words in all the right ways to describe a particular thought or idea we have within us, and yet it rarely ever feels (at least to me), as if it has been accurately portrayed or put across in the way that I want, especially when I reflect on it afterwards. This usually deters me from finishing the things I want to write about, as I become quickly aware of the fact that my internal states are slowly being distorted by the very act of me describing them. And yet, what choice do we have but to use words?
By way of convenience and habit, and the fact we have little else, words are about the only thing we can fall back on when we want to communicate and translate our ideas to the world. Of course there are also other mediums people use for self-expression: things like art, drama, and visual story-telling - but even these have their limitations and shortcomings to some extent. Maybe I demand and expect too much from myself and language in general.
I care about accuracy so much and focus on it in the way that I do because I'm of the opinion that when something is put across in an extremely genuine and sincere manner it can actually be felt and picked up in a strong way. I think there's obviously a difference between something that took a few seconds or minutes to write, vs. something that took several hours, or even a few days to complete. If we care about what we're doing, we will insist upon taking as long as we need to. In any other case, we will press buttons only because those buttons do something, and not to bring about something that will ultimately make people think and feel.
It's easy to just use words for a particular purpose or outcome in an almost superficial "means-to-an-end" kind of way, but it isn't quite so easy to consciously reflect on our words as we convey them, and to truly dive deep into their meaning and their intent as they arise within our minds. Conscious examination of ourselves expends our time and our energy - resources which we are taught and trained by our environment to channel into everyday activities and routines instead - the so-called "important" things about life; the things which generate fast and easy results for us; the things that make us comfortable, secure, and significant.
Human civilization has (sadly) become extremely survival-based in the way that it operates, and a lot of we do, say, and believe, is really just about staying afloat, about getting from A to B in the shortest, most productive way we can; gotta do this to get that, gotta be first in line, gotta get what's mine, etc.
Meh, whatever.
26-30, M
