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I Am Flooded With Memories, Memories, Memories

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My dad build our house 50 years ago. My mom died here my sister died here and recently my dad has died here. I still live here. Its a big house, things are falling apart. I can't possibly keep up with fixing and taking care of it. I'm already struggling to pay the bills. I am afraid to move, but I think its inevitable. How do I just leave all the objects and memories that have accumulated.? I'm having a really hard time with this.
46-50, F
12 replies
Apr 5, 2019
poses · 41-45, M
Remebering, loving them, knowing their hope and love for you far outweighed what you are burdened with. I'm sorry that may mean letting go
melissa001 · 46-50, F
[@775769,eqfish] thank u.
Nipplelover16 · 41-45, M
Mamapolo2016 · 61-69, F
As a parent, I can say with some confidence that your parents would not want you burdened with a house that drains you dry.

As you prepare to move, take time to fix the memories in your mind. Make a diary and write down the best ones so you can visit them any time you like.

Keep the pieces that mean the most to you and sell the rest, knowing your parents are happy to be the source of that money to get you set up in a new life.

Memories aren't supposed to be chains. They're supposed to be wings.
melissa001 · 46-50, F
[@663519,Mamapolo2016] thank u so much. It help coming from a parent. ❤
polyandrym66 · 61-69, M
Don't even think of moving out.. Find a loving partner who is also a fix'er upper, and keep him happy while he works on your home...
melissa001 · 46-50, F
[@1473,polyandrym66] yes wouldn't that be nice. Its not that easy to go find someone. I had a boyfriend of 2 yrs and just up and left. So I don't see myself just going out and snagging up another one to help me.
polyandrym66 · 61-69, M
[@507791,melissa001] Try, try, try...
Heartlander · 70-79, M
I understand. It's like everything there is a part of history, your history. Everything has meaning and feelings, like it's a part of you. We've been through that so many times as our parents and the older generation all died off.

But what worked for them may not work for you, or me.

Our daughter helped us move beyond with her old toys, made by hand by my dad, her grandfather. After our daughter grew up, married and moved away, the toys just sat in our basement for the next 20 years. A personal connection to her granddad.

When we suggested that we bring them to her house she suggested we instead give them to kids that would actually play with them rather than just let them sit in either her basement or our basement. Yes, they were extra special toys. Works of art made by a master craftsman, but they were still toys that were to be played with, and neither she nor we had played with them for 20+20 years. So we were just wasting them.
zefyr · 26-30, M
You could take a picture with a good camera or by a professional photographer with how you remember the house, the stuffs you want to remember the most. That way you got an album to swipe and look through if you ever start missing the house. I know it’s not much but this is the best way to remember memories. Hope it helps.
Greybare · M
They say, "Women can do everything a man can do," but its nor really true.

Building a house or keeping it in repair takes a wealth of specialized knowledge and a willingness to get your hands dirty doing hard, dirty, dangerous work. Few women are willing to do it.

Its a large family home, and if you don't have your own family then its not a good home for you. Pass it on to another large family with your blessing.
melissa001 · 46-50, F
[@880701,Greybare] I actually have done all the repairs and more. I can do and have done what most guys can. If I had just one person to help me with things that take two people, I could get by. Or if I had the money to pay someone to do everything. But I don't have either. So I kinda don't have a choice.

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