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How do I bring myself to stop worrying about my mom so much?

She's extremely vulnerable, never eating whenever she shares dinner, always let's everyone walks over her and constantly disrespects her. She's been married to a man that has belittled and criticized her food (even though she's an excellent cook) for decades. I just worry about her because she's not one to fight back and stand up for herself and I HATE to see her being disrespected. As a result, I am always in arguments with my older brother and father whenever they're being disrespectful. For this reason, I'm not on speaking terms with either of them.

I hate my household and country at large and I CAN'T WAIT for an opportunity to migrate but I just get overwhelmingly heartbroken whenever I think of leaving her behind.

I know I have a life to live and all but my mom has been through soooooo much darn abuse, both physically and verbally and I just have a soft spot for her.

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Vivaci

Awww....I’m so sorry you’re going through this. 🥺

You should go abroad first and then when you’re capable enough, you can get her to join you. 🤗

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Vivaci

I know exactly what you mean!!

I’ve separated from him emotionally and physically for many years now. But I don’t like to trust anyone who looks remotely like him. That is so natural, isn’t it? 🥺@Alifeinterrupted

Alifeinterrupted · 26-30, F

@Vivaci yes..yes it is! I hope you heal and heal well! I'm here for you..should you ever need a listening ear or just a stranger to vent to 🤗

Vivaci

@Alifeinterrupted awww...thank you! Same goes to you...💙🤗💙🤗

sassypants · 36-40, F

Your Mother is a domestic victim. She has been gaslighted into believing it is somehow normal and probably believes it s her fault when he gets angry. You are right to stand up for her and maybe one day she will listen to you.

Alifeinterrupted · 26-30, F

@sassypants I sure do hope so

QueenandCrown · 41-45, F

You're a good daughter, and I agree you should try to help your mother as much as you can. Some people are not that assertive. Are you and your mom able to afford a place on your own?

Alifeinterrupted · 26-30, F

@QueenandCrown thank you! I would like to think I'm a good daughter, I would give my life if it meant saving hers.

The issue I have with her is her fear for my dad and the control he has over her. She has told me that she'll come if I were to move out or migrate but I honestly don't believe she would because the last time traveled to the US for two months, he made her feel soooooo effing guilty for leaving him alone for so long. God..I hate the man

Wiseacre · F

That’s nice...mom has to learn to stand her ground.

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