I Am Having a Bad Night

Day started ok. Got out of the house, played some tabletop games with the guys for a few hours. Come home to find my kitty acting sick again. He had an infection and was diagnosed with kidney trouble a couple months ago and was hospitalized for the week. He was doing better with antibiotics and started getting his weight back and generally seeming happy. Tonight he's really runny nosed again, looks like eating is bothering him, and generally acting off. Not as bad as last time. Maybe he'll spring back by morning. But right now I'm expecting I'll have to call the vet Monday to get an appointment. I am so nervous because I can't afford another hospitalization. The stress adding to the general malaise I've been under and I find myself at 4am and still having trouble getting to sleep. I'm so worried I won't be able to get my kitty what he needs and that might shortchange his future. Maybe I'll get lucky and we can just get some medicine if it's the same thing. But I already feel like I'm failing him.