I Love My Kids Very Much
Just sitting here thinking how fortunate I am. Having grown up without a father, I remember being scared to death when I found out we were expecting my oldest son. His birth changed my life. My father inadvertently taught me that I never wanted to leave my kids without a dad, so my commitment was total. Even so, my mistakes were legion. There was so much I had to learn.
I discovered that my children were amazing at extending Grace to me. I had strong opinions, inconsistencies at times in my behavior and I loved my job too much when they were little. They grew up and simply loved me for who I was and each (4 eventually) had to learn early on that I wasn't perfect. That particular lesson broke my heart. How do you come back from mistakes that your kids witness.
In junior high and high school they had the meanest parents. No cell phone, limited time on tv and video games and I always knew where they were. Now, all four adults and the three boys married to wonderful young ladies, and they are truly my best friends. Mostly nowadays I listen to their advice (lol.. definitely if it has anything to do with technology). Their love is consistent and evident and each of them in their unique ways makes me smile and laugh.. I am seeing a movie with my daughter on Saturday (Tomb raider); spending Easter sunday with my oldest and his family, my youngest and my daughter.. dinner and easter egg hunt.. will be a great day.. my other son is moving for a new job, expecting their first child and trying to buy a home. He calls me for advice, even though I know he's already made up his mind.. it's very considerate of him and I pretend to give him advice, while really just affirming his decisions which I trust completely.
I am blessed.. I don't know what tomorrow will bring and to be honest, I still worry at night since I don't know that they are safe in their homes or not, but I couldn't ask for better children.
I discovered that my children were amazing at extending Grace to me. I had strong opinions, inconsistencies at times in my behavior and I loved my job too much when they were little. They grew up and simply loved me for who I was and each (4 eventually) had to learn early on that I wasn't perfect. That particular lesson broke my heart. How do you come back from mistakes that your kids witness.
In junior high and high school they had the meanest parents. No cell phone, limited time on tv and video games and I always knew where they were. Now, all four adults and the three boys married to wonderful young ladies, and they are truly my best friends. Mostly nowadays I listen to their advice (lol.. definitely if it has anything to do with technology). Their love is consistent and evident and each of them in their unique ways makes me smile and laugh.. I am seeing a movie with my daughter on Saturday (Tomb raider); spending Easter sunday with my oldest and his family, my youngest and my daughter.. dinner and easter egg hunt.. will be a great day.. my other son is moving for a new job, expecting their first child and trying to buy a home. He calls me for advice, even though I know he's already made up his mind.. it's very considerate of him and I pretend to give him advice, while really just affirming his decisions which I trust completely.
I am blessed.. I don't know what tomorrow will bring and to be honest, I still worry at night since I don't know that they are safe in their homes or not, but I couldn't ask for better children.
61-69, M
