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I Hurt Myself

I realized something. I realized that I can't come to my dad's expectation of wanting me to act my age. I have tried so hard to do it, but end up doing myself more harm then good. I struggled, got more stressed, and lead myself to be unhappy. If I did succeed I would only be making my dad happy, not me. I want to be happy and my happiness is more important then the expectation. I never could act like a teen, mainly because I'm not really a teen-mentally that is. If I stay a child for a life time then i should get to enjoy it. I think it would be a good idea to finally open up to what toys I would want to have. Or at least see if I can buy one with my walmart gift card. But I do know there are other things that I can do to make my dad happy. I got a good grade for english 9, that's a start right there. And I was happy for that as well.
KandiGhostcat · 22-25, F
@NearMiss My mentality can go 2 ways: 1. I could stay mentally younger for all or most of my life. Or 2. My mentality can change to be more of a appropriate state for my age. I've gotten diagnosed with being mentally younger this year by the neurologist. So that's how we found out. Cause before that my mom was trying to figure out if something was wrong with me or not. But it does bug me when someone tells me to act my age even though I tell them I'm mentally younger. I just do the best I can do for now.
KandiGhostcat · 22-25, F
@NearMiss Your mentality is suppose to match up with your actual age. At a time mine did, but then it went the other way instead. And because of that my mentality ended up staying like a child. So it seems as if my brain didn't get to maturity yet like it was suppose to. Because of that I will act, behave, and feel like a child. So if you put it this way, I'm really just a child trying to be a high schooler. If that makes sense.
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