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suchaslife 路 F
SW-User
@suchaslife be yourself you'll never please everybody.
HoraceGreenley 路 56-60, M
EugenieLaBorgia 路 F
HoraceGreenley 路 56-60, M
@EugenieLaBorgia is that one of his fables, or does it just sound like one?
EugenieLaBorgia 路 F
@HoraceGreenley It is one of his, yes! Aesop Daudet, my village greengrocer. Skilled with fruit and vegetables; art-time sage!
HoraceGreenley 路 56-60, M
@EugenieLaBorgia You're village must really be something!
JohnOinger 路 41-45, M
HoraceGreenley 路 56-60, M
suchaslife 路 F
@HoraceGreenley Hahaha
PirateMonkeyCabinet 路 36-40, M
Sounds like a good image of how the world tends to be and have been for the longest time.
No matter what you do, there will always be someone who takes issue with you or your actions. Pleasing one person upsets the next. While one might be able to find a ground that resonates with a larger portion of a group, there is no such thing as pleasing everyone.
Not only that, but there will always be people who judge even without knowing or understanding your situation. They will judge without asking why things are like they are, why you have made the choices you have, and without even trying to see where you come from.
Even now I see it in certain online groups and cultures, where some people are hounded into apologizing for something they aren't always guilty of. When the pressure reaches critical mass, some do apologize even though they don't really owe an apology, solely to please and get people of their back. And then the very people who demanded the apology turn to harassing because the person apologized, how that means they are guilty of every bad thing under the sun, that the very act of apologizing is an insult to them, etc.
Again, yet another situation where no matter what is done, it will be turned against you.
At the end of the day, I suppose all we can do is - rather than try to appease everyone - to try to accept ourselves, align ourselves with our goals and values, be open and understanding as best we can and focus on the people who do matter to us in life.
No matter what you do, there will always be someone who takes issue with you or your actions. Pleasing one person upsets the next. While one might be able to find a ground that resonates with a larger portion of a group, there is no such thing as pleasing everyone.
Not only that, but there will always be people who judge even without knowing or understanding your situation. They will judge without asking why things are like they are, why you have made the choices you have, and without even trying to see where you come from.
Even now I see it in certain online groups and cultures, where some people are hounded into apologizing for something they aren't always guilty of. When the pressure reaches critical mass, some do apologize even though they don't really owe an apology, solely to please and get people of their back. And then the very people who demanded the apology turn to harassing because the person apologized, how that means they are guilty of every bad thing under the sun, that the very act of apologizing is an insult to them, etc.
Again, yet another situation where no matter what is done, it will be turned against you.
At the end of the day, I suppose all we can do is - rather than try to appease everyone - to try to accept ourselves, align ourselves with our goals and values, be open and understanding as best we can and focus on the people who do matter to us in life.
suchaslife 路 F
Could you please tell me what you meant by this?
Most people are indeed good. When it seems otherwise, when it seems like a place is full of cruel people, it usually comes down to a vocal minority. The ones most easily heard are the ones that screams the loudest, so to speak, not the ones going about their business being patient, calm and kind. @PirateMonkeyCabinet
Most people are indeed good. When it seems otherwise, when it seems like a place is full of cruel people, it usually comes down to a vocal minority. The ones most easily heard are the ones that screams the loudest, so to speak, not the ones going about their business being patient, calm and kind. @PirateMonkeyCabinet
PirateMonkeyCabinet 路 36-40, M
@suchaslife Imagine this:
You are sitting at a restaurant. 30 tables there, all occupied with 3-4 people on each table. A group of young adults arrive and gets seated. They are loud, scream, obnoxious, don't try to be mindful that there are others there, are rude to the staff, smashes glasses. The police eventually take them away.
As you leave the restaurant all you can think are these extremely rude and loud people. There were 29 other tables there, full of good people who behaved well and were respectful, yet what we'd usually remember is that one table where trouble brewed.
The next day somewhere else, someone is reading the newspaper. There's an article about these young adults causing trouble in the restaurant. On the next page is an article about this kid who broke into an elderly home and thrashed the place "for fun". The guy reading the newspaper says to himself: "youngsters these days, nothing but trouble". In reality, there may have been 50 kids that did good things that day, but the guy who read the newspaper could only see the bad ones... because the bad ones were the one who grabbed the attention.
When you said:
[quote]Most importantly and my favourite is that MOST people are good![/quote]
...that is what I started thinking about.
We hear about the evildoers all the time, be it on the news or as we witness them on the street, or even here on the internet. They grab our attention and fill it with their cruel antics. It is so easy to start thinking that there world consists of evil before anything else, whilst in reality that ain't true: most people are good people, it just doesn't always feel like that because the fewer who do bad things are the ones that stick out like a sore thumb.
Not sure if I explained what I meant very well (I know I'm not always the best at explaining stuff), and if I got it across properly. Hopefully I did.
You are sitting at a restaurant. 30 tables there, all occupied with 3-4 people on each table. A group of young adults arrive and gets seated. They are loud, scream, obnoxious, don't try to be mindful that there are others there, are rude to the staff, smashes glasses. The police eventually take them away.
As you leave the restaurant all you can think are these extremely rude and loud people. There were 29 other tables there, full of good people who behaved well and were respectful, yet what we'd usually remember is that one table where trouble brewed.
The next day somewhere else, someone is reading the newspaper. There's an article about these young adults causing trouble in the restaurant. On the next page is an article about this kid who broke into an elderly home and thrashed the place "for fun". The guy reading the newspaper says to himself: "youngsters these days, nothing but trouble". In reality, there may have been 50 kids that did good things that day, but the guy who read the newspaper could only see the bad ones... because the bad ones were the one who grabbed the attention.
When you said:
[quote]Most importantly and my favourite is that MOST people are good![/quote]
...that is what I started thinking about.
We hear about the evildoers all the time, be it on the news or as we witness them on the street, or even here on the internet. They grab our attention and fill it with their cruel antics. It is so easy to start thinking that there world consists of evil before anything else, whilst in reality that ain't true: most people are good people, it just doesn't always feel like that because the fewer who do bad things are the ones that stick out like a sore thumb.
Not sure if I explained what I meant very well (I know I'm not always the best at explaining stuff), and if I got it across properly. Hopefully I did.
suchaslife 路 F
@PirateMonkeyCabinet I understand, thank you.
mathsman 路 70-79, M
Ah, other people LOL