I Have No Friends and Need Some Friends

Well i have no friends, and i don't need any, but i would like some.
I have no one to share all the experiences that life throws at me like celebrating your favourite sports teams victory/loss, bemoaning the to hot/to cold weather, how good this film was or how bad the other was. Someone to laugh at me when i fall down and still be chucleing when they help me back to my feet.