I Am Lost In Life

Yeah.. that is pretty much my only problem! I was actually really bad before and sometimes am now haha.. It's not really that I don't think I'll enjoy anything, it's just that I don't have anything I want to work toward. No ambition for money, a family, friends.. I don't want recognition for anything either. That's the really bad place I've gotten into..
My therapist made a joke about how I'm too young to be giving up on life, but that's the only mindset I know now so it's all about trying to find little things and talking to people who will help me get into new situations.. There isn't anybody around at the moment.. and my parents can't conceive what's going on with me so they just let me sit around all day doing nothing. The only driving force behind my life right now is the fact that I would hate myself if I took all that I've taken from the people who love me and gave nothing back.. If I let myself turn out a burden and nothing more. That's all I want I suppose.. I don't want to be a burden. Haha well there's a driving force I suppose!

Be your own driving force. Certainly there's something that drives you to carry on with your life. There's nothing wrong with not having ambitions for others. Have them for yourself. I've found that in my life, I've gotten through without want for money, recognition or a bunch of friends.

It all found me somehow. Education is a great way to start. Then suddenly, life takes a life of its own. You're young, just take baby steps and suddenly it will happen. Be patient.

Thanks for responding.

Yep.. well education is where I'll be starting! Next month actually haha. I was in the kind of situation where I got out of high school and got a pretty nice job, and it was entirely conceivable that I would have just stayed there for a good while before making plans.. but things got all messed up so now I'm kind of floundering around; not able to picture a worthwhile future of any kind xD

So.. it will take some time to get my life and my mindset back in order.. but I am definitely starting :) Now if only it were easier for me to get out of the house! haha. Thank You for responding!

At your young age cutting the purse strings is HARD. You want the iPad, Internet connection, TV and all meals handed to you. Believe me when I say my kids were the same. They are on their own and either have given up on that stuff or learned to pay for it.

Haha well.. The TV and the tablet I did buy for myself! But yeah haha the things that matter.. rent and food xD are nice. Especially when they're gladly handing it over! I did actually try to move out before.. but yeah haha.. These problems arose xD I could have easily made it out on my own with a tiny bit of assistance from a family member, but I just don't have anything I want.. and until there's something I want, there's no way I can try that again..
So right now what I want is to figure out what I want! So getting out more often, socializing, getting work done, and just having more experiences are the things that will lead me to knowing what I want.. and being able to be someone who wants to take care of themselves.. In regular peoples' minds, I should just be dead haha.. But I suppose I'm lucky.. having help until I can manage it on my own..