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I Am a Father

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[big]Why Is It So Important For A Father To Be In His Daughter's Life?[/big]

THIS QUESTION WAS ASKED OF ME BY A YOUNG WOMAN:
[i]Why is it so important for a father to be in his daughter's life?[/i]

After standing there for a few minutes with my jaw hanging down, I finally answered:

This question just blows me away. Seriously. You don't know?


I don't know the relationship you have with your father. I do know the one I have with my daughter, however. I know why I am the way I am, and why I do things the way I do them. So, again, I can't speak for all dads, just me.

1. My daughter is the first girl born in my family line in 64 years. No, that's not a typo. 64 years. To say she is treasured beyond all measure is an understatement, considering that in my family, you only get ONE daughter per generation, and usually the first born. So, yeah. Nothing will come between me and her, unless it wants to suffer pain with extreme prejudice. Try to harm her, and pain will be the least of your worries. That's not a promise. It's a guarantee.

2. I am her Knight and her Protector. I am the Shield between her and a cruel world that doesn't care about her welfare and well being, until such a time that she can do it on her own, with or without my having her back.

3. I am her Teacher. I am her Mentor. I must impart to her all the skills I have, so that she may survive and thrive, flourishing in a world that will one day not have me there anymore, because eventually-- we all die.

4. I am the Example. I am the Template. I am what she will consider "normal" for a husband and a future father to be, and what she will seek for companionship when she is looking for a mate, and as such, I must be the kind of man that I would want my daughter to be with, one who will love her with all of his heart and soul, and give themselves completely to her.

5. I am her Truth. I am her Rock. I never lie to her. I keep my morals and my ideals constant, a solid foundation upon which she may build her own. I live by my word, and by my deeds, one and the same. She knows that I am consistent, and she can count on it, no matter what.

I could go on, but that's the basics. I don't know why it's important for anyone else, but I know why it is for me.

It's because she so important to me.
51-55, M
39
46 replies
214 views
Jan 30, 2017
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This message was deleted by the author of the main post.
SW User
I hope your daughter knows what a lucky young lady she is....
Why is she lucky? I am not saying she's not but every child ought to have a father who cares and loves them.

Being a parent is a HUGE commitment, a lifetime commitment.
Of TWO people, not just a mother. (Or just a father). And their families too..
It changes you :)
It makes you better as a human being.

It should not be some privilege that daddy sticks around and daddy gives a massive hoot.

Sadly, it does seem that way, more often than I care to admit.
SW User
@Lunadelobos: She's lucky because the way things SHOULD BE is often not the way they are; a father who thinks this way is rare. I'm not insinuating that fathers shouldn't think this way, I'm simply acknowledging the fact that most do not, therefore most daughters do not have the kind of father she has.
[@421950,Lakesidepoet] Perhaps if our standards and expectations were higher...? :)
Perhaps if we had better radars, yadda yadda yadda... and so on, infinitum.

I not only comprehend what you mean, I have also lived this.

I don't think that I put too much stock in *luck*.

The good man is doing his proper duty by his girl child 👶.
She and he are blessed.
Silentspectator · 41-45, F
[b][c=#000000]Bookmarked![/c][/b]

👌 No more; no less!
Blessed be the bond!
[youtube=https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qNtsIXAANM0]

I only wish all dads cared, even half as much.
Nice for me to read :)
cloudi · 31-35, F
Wonderful and such a strong statements. Always admire a dedicated father 😊

To be fair, that young woman didn't ask a silly question, in my opinion. Not every one knows how to be a father or at least the important roles of a father.
GwydionFrost · 51-55, M
I would never accuse her of asking a silly question... it just blew me away that she didn't know, or even have a clue. Which is an damning indicator of her own father's failure to establish a meaningful relationship with her, I reckon. It's just... well, I can't even wrap my brain around the idea that someone wouldn't be compelled to do this for their children...! I mean, if YOU don't, WHO WILL..?!?
cloudi · 31-35, F
I hope all father could have that kind of thought. Seriously. Sadly 😔
U sound like the perfect adult man
GwydionFrost · 51-55, M
LOL... I would never EVER make that claim. That's a lot of shoe to fill. :P

I will accept the compliment when it comes to prioritizing my children in my responsibilities... but it's definitely a stretch for the rest of me. ;)
@GwydionFrost: I hope i can find a husband like u
I worry lot about being a mom ,i wish none make me cus i believe i cant do it
GwydionFrost · 51-55, M
@moonthesolitary: 😊

Ok, so... I'm blushing. First-- want a husband that works for you...? You should read the OTHER essay I've Featured on my profile: The 4 Elements.

https://similarworlds.com/story?fid=4764229&tid=573646&name=I--m-A-People-Watcher

See, it's going to show you whether you have what it takes to LAST. Which is important, if you are desiring to raise children together.

Next, as far as being a mom goes...? I have found, as a parent, that if I ask THIS ONE QUESTION before taking any action or making any decision, I have never chosen wrong:

"Is this in the best interests and benefit of my children...?"

EVERY decision and action framed by this question first...? Will keep you honest.
BabyTay98 · 18-21, F
This makes me realise what an asshole my dad is. But beautiful on your part.
BabyTay98 · 18-21, F
[@188267,GwydionFrost] My dad is never there, I hardly see him whatsoever. He has a new family now.
EnigmaticGeek · 56-60, M
[@382384,BabyTay98] Sorry about your dad. :-( I guess that explains why he never came up in any of our conversations.
GwydionFrost · 51-55, M
[@382384,BabyTay98] My dad and I didn't talk for quite a while... like, for YEARS. I think he had a health scare, and realized that he might actually need to establish a relationship with the now two grown men he raised. Now, we talk more often, but nowhere near what my mom and I do. He also remarried, but... yeah, no new kids. He didn't like that gig the first time around-- why ask for more...? ;)
Silentspectator · 41-45, F
Revisited and thanks for keeping the post.
SW User
No doubts parents must be guides, models and supporters...
Coralmist · 36-40, F
Wow.. that is beautiful, inspiring and really melts your heart, truly. My dad has unfortunately been the complete opposite of any single thing you said or emanate. He actually TOLD me 'I don't care' when he was ignoring me over an issue or question I was asking... I had gotten so sad, and said 'do you even care?' and I repeated it, and he said that, above. I just was heartbroken, and when I talk to him about my mom's awful abuse , he says' 'move on'. ONe time I needed a ride only for 10 mins down the road (I was being released from the hospital) and he was going to be in the area within an hour.. he said to get a cab. Now normally its ok I guess, its not the end of the world: BUT he was going to be in the area :/ NO heart, no care for anyone but him. To see a dad like you is just baffling to me.. like, it exists??? A dad that WANTS to love and cherish and be there for his daughter? I admire you and thank you for sharing this from your heart: it is a real eye opener that LOVE exists and it is not some dream- what a GREAT post.
GwydionFrost · 51-55, M
[@562099,Cloverleaf] You know, while my heart was warmed by your praise, it was broken by your reality. Even on my girls' worst days, when they are acting like your dad did to you, to me (after all, you don't appreciate what you have until you don't)...? They are still my "happy place", and I tell them so.

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I Am a Father
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Updated: 2 mths ago
Categories: Fatherhood, Parenting and Family
Content Rating: Non-Adult
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