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I Am a Father

[big]Why Is It So Important For A Father To Be In His Daughter's Life?[/big]

THIS QUESTION WAS ASKED OF ME BY A YOUNG WOMAN:
[i]Why is it so important for a father to be in his daughter's life?[/i]

After standing there for a few minutes with my jaw hanging down, I finally answered:

This question just blows me away. Seriously. You don't know?


I don't know the relationship you have with your father. I do know the one I have with my daughter, however. I know why I am the way I am, and why I do things the way I do them. So, again, I can't speak for all dads, just me.

1. My daughter is the first girl born in my family line in 64 years. No, that's not a typo. 64 years. To say she is treasured beyond all measure is an understatement, considering that in my family, you only get ONE daughter per generation, and usually the first born. So, yeah. Nothing will come between me and her, unless it wants to suffer pain with extreme prejudice. Try to harm her, and pain will be the least of your worries. That's not a promise. It's a guarantee.

2. I am her Knight and her Protector. I am the Shield between her and a cruel world that doesn't care about her welfare and well being, until such a time that she can do it on her own, with or without my having her back.

3. I am her Teacher. I am her Mentor. I must impart to her all the skills I have, so that she may survive and thrive, flourishing in a world that will one day not have me there anymore, because eventually-- we all die.

4. I am the Example. I am the Template. I am what she will consider "normal" for a husband and a future father to be, and what she will seek for companionship when she is looking for a mate, and as such, I must be the kind of man that I would want my daughter to be with, one who will love her with all of his heart and soul, and give themselves completely to her.

5. I am her Truth. I am her Rock. I never lie to her. I keep my morals and my ideals constant, a solid foundation upon which she may build her own. I live by my word, and by my deeds, one and the same. She knows that I am consistent, and she can count on it, no matter what.

I could go on, but that's the basics. I don't know why it's important for anyone else, but I know why it is for me.

It's because she so important to me.
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Scribbles36-40, F
I like this post because it appears that you try to be mindful of being a good father for your daughter and see it as an important priority. 馃憤馃憤馃憤

As for me, most of my life, I felt like men live in a totally nother universe and when I need something I just had to deal with visiting a rather shady black market for whatever I needed.
GwydionFrost56-60, M
@Scribbles I don't know what made me peek in here, but I saw your post, and it choked me up. I'm sorry that was your experience. I wish there was a way to undo the damages and heal the wound.
Scribbles36-40, F
@GwydionFrost Erm...I feel a tad embarrassed by my answer a year and a half later... because I don't feel that way anymore about ALL men.

What I said is certainly how I felt at the time and most all of my life. But perhaps it might soothe you to hear that since then I've had months of productive therapy (I had a lot to sort out), and a very supportive boyfriend, and reconnected with the...idk...good people in my life far more, and was determined to let go/leave the toxic and bad people behind as much as I could etc. I did and do have people...including some men who are more or less good people in my life...I just wasn't mentally capable of believing it or recognizing it until quite recently...

I'm rather glad you replied to my comment though I am sorry it caused you some sadness. It reminded me that I have been able to put alot of crap away in the past and be free from it and be a stronger happier person and be able to have the kinds of fear-free relationships with some friends and family I've always wanted.

Thank you for your kind comment :)
GwydionFrost56-60, M
@Scribbles Wow. Wish granted. That's one fast genie. 馃槻

Color me impressed. That's amazing news indeed! I'm so happy for you being able to break free from the chains of your past, and that you've been making steady progress ever since...!