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I Can't Leave

I keep contemplating the idea of leaving and I keep getting more reasons to leave since I can't connect with or keep my connections with anyone. There are still a lot of people here I admire and would love to get to know better but I can't because they're just going to end up disliking me sooner or later. That really disheartens me but it is what it is. Sure I still have some friends here who do like me for some reason or another but I'm not so sure if it's going to stay that way with any of them anymore. With all the "close friends" I've lost here, I'm not sure I actually have any real friends. It makes me regret ever coming here. Hell, I do regret coming here! Nothing has quite made me feel as empty and alone as this place has. Not to blame the site, of course. It's not SW's fault that I can't have friends. I mean I should just never have come here in the first place. I keep wanting to cut my losses and just leave but I can't kid myself; I may leave for a little while but I would only keep coming back and I'm not about to become one of [i]those[/i] users. Still, I seem to be locked in a paradox of not wanting to be here any longer yet I simply cannot bring myself to leave. Damn my stupid, pointless feelings.

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IrishPat · M

This place can be torturous in a way. There are good people here as well as some maybe not so good.
What makes you think that the friends you make will always end up leaving you?
It could possible be more of a personal issue with themselves rather than an issue with you.
I get it though. I haven’t made a lot of friends here. It’s a hard place to crack at times.

Carver · 31-35, F

@IrishPat The most recent one I lost was someone I have been on a very close and personal level with, for well over a year. That tells me I can't fully place my confidence any of the other close friends I've made here. All of them may very well end up getting tired of me too.

IrishPat · M

@Carver well don’t be disheartened. As sad as that is and it really is very sad and I’m sorry that has happened, don’t let it affect how you interact with your other friends. Not everyone is the same. Doesn’t mean everyone will do the same

Carver · 31-35, F

@IrishPat Thanks but we're way past that now.

IrishPat · M

@Carver I do hate this place at times. Can be quite toxic. Breaks away from it are needed.