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I Just Realized

My friend just told me that the reason that the women I have been pursuing (IRL for relationships) haven't been working out because they're not my type

I asked her what my type is, and she told me my type is the "sweet innocent virgin type"

Apparently she can usually tell just by looking at pictures, and those were always the girls that I liked the most and was fascinated by even though I didn't actually know they were virgins (she insists she can tell)

Thinking back, that's what I always wanted, but I decided that I wasn't worthy of what I really wanted and tried for something else

I'm gentle and loving, scary strong but a protector and not a danger, and want a deep bond of love, absolutely adore when a woman is clingy because she really likes me, totally love being playful and I like to be old fashioned

Would a woman of that type ever give me a chance? Looking deep down, that really is what I want

---------------------------------

I totally just realized, the type of women that I like best really do like me, I just live in the US where there's not a lot of innocence left, a lot of that type that are too young liked me (off the table because I'm not willing to meeting Bubba in prison), women from countries where abstinence until marriage is common liked me, and the few times I got to know a sweet innocent virgin that was of age and lived near to me I felt like I wasn't good enough and I was terrified out of my mind thinking I would get hurt or mess up because I didn't feel good enough and knew I would fall in love too hard to fast

It all makes sense now, I'm sure I'll meet one again, I just need to realize that they do actually like me (always have until I blew it) and not be afraid, not worry about being good enough and just treat them well, and it will work out

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SW-User

What if they lost their virginity to rape?

What if they chose it and enjoyed it but have since repented?

What if they love getting down and dirty but are pure of heart?

th3r0n · 41-45, M

@SW-User knew one that lost it to rape, got along well but the damage changes things. Not off the menu but that makes life much harder for them more than anyone but also for anyone close to them (one more reason I believe in a death penalty for fully proven rape)

If they chose it and enjoyed it but since repented, they would be just like me. While I can see that working, more pure is better.

Fornication inherently corrupts the heart, so that last one is much like an oxymoron

SW-User

@th3r0n Did it corrupt your heart? If so, how? (Not disagreeing, just want to explore your thought process more)

th3r0n · 41-45, M

@SW-User yes, it did

While I only had full intercourse with two women in my whole life, even that made my heart not right and took so long to mostly reverse, with the second of two being 14 years ago, and still having thoughts and memories of such things that make my heart less pure

I have healed and sought purity again, I am not done, but even that so long ago still has an effect

SW-User

@th3r0n what's purity to you? I am assuming it it's beyond whether or not someone is sexually active, because you'll presumably be sexually active with your partner

One thing I love about my partner is that he's a healer. He enjoys restoring my faith in men and humanity. He sees it as part if his role as a man. I think likewise I like to help heal the bits damaged in life.

At the end we all have to accept that our partners have had life experience

Sure someone at 15 has a purer view of life than someone at 40. How will you cope with change and growth in a partner as she matures and ages?

I also think - be careful what you wish for - you could get your wish only to find her personality flawed in another way - which is fundamentally deeper than sexual 'purity' - whatever that actually is

th3r0n · 41-45, M

@SW-User purity is to keep your heart and mind on what is good and set apart, to keep from any wickedness of heart or mind or deed

To be pure, one must not only abstain from fornication and murder and hate and lies but keep these also out of their heart

Being in a relationship doesn’t equate to being sexually active to me

SW-User

@th3r0n you say fornication like it (sex) is a bad thing, but sex can equally be love making. Sex can be an incredibly beautiful expression of love

th3r0n · 41-45, M

@SW-User sex isn’t fornication, sex with someone you’re not rightfully married to is fornication

SW-User

@th3r0n it is a shame that so often isn't someone you love - especially if we're talking historically when young girls were often married off to old goats they had no desire to share their bodies with