I Will Take As Many Words As I Want To Write This Story
Even in Her Absence, she Inspires-----(the below was also posted in "I Love Hongruilin" As i saw it was fitting to include it there , in a group devoted to the love of her- as well as a group I started. It is a direct copy amd posted there first. Some of the comment in the post refer to that group and are not meant to confuse.BUT--I did use an altername picture! )
I'd love to say that I founded this group but that honor goes to another. To another that formed it and left it void until I fount it. I DID post the first story here. "What's Not To Love? " THat was under my old accont and I wish I had that story saved. But it is lost to time and to memory. As this site, as we know it now, soon will be.
Love is a mild word for how I felt for Hongruilin!! Much like saying the "One ring" was only a ring. An understatement of epic proportions. In my life, that of 59 years, no one has ever touched me as she has.!!!!! And no one ever will again. In that- I may not be alone. There are a lot of silent voices on EP. Ones that visit our accounts or stories and never, ever comment. Not because they cannot - but because words may well escape them. Or they may feel they casnnot do the poster justice in thier comment. I am not referring to me. I wish. But to the dear lady whom this group is named for. She helped me in more ways than she , or anyone else, will ever know. To that degree it pains I do not have her email or contact info. But real love is often fleeting. And perhaps that just makes the memory of her all the more sweeter.
And to that end I come to this. This, which may well be the epitath of EP-- the entire site.
It is something Hongruilin wrote in the Spring of 2014 and posted it in my group "I will Take as Many Words as I Want to Write this story" ( a title which was an inside joke and jab at her- and others- me as well!lol) It is apt today- and is still as inspiring today as that day in 2014. She just had a command of the English language that few can come close to. I was always in awe how she could use words to get her points across. A gift I wish I had- For it IS A GIFT! One minute we would be laughing, the next, in tears. Wanting and wishing we could go back through time and space and hurt those that hurt her. To be able to hold her and assure her all will be OK.
I will post this also in my group- but it belongs here as well. For it is her. One this page- where even in absense, she lives. Lives in the words and posts of other before me- and after me (remember, the first story?)
And without any more sentimentality on my part --this is the end of it all. As said by the one I love more than life itself. Hongruilin!
Permanent Darkness
Having unflnchingly provided all that it had within,
liberally sharing both of it's warmth and light,
the flame sputtered, gradually flickering out.
There was nothing left to give.
It was completely spent.
