I Wish You Knew My Pain

Empty. She's got nothing; no scream, cry, laugh, she barely even has a voice. Now she's got a new symptom; pain. Physical pain. Her arms and legs feel like they have bruises on them, but there is nothing there. She sleeps all the time too. This girl has no energy anymore, no matter how many cups of coffee she drinks. The skeletons are piling up so high in her closet, that the door will burst open any second. Everything is darker than it has ever been, and it doesn't scare her too much. She can feel the poison swimming through her veins, and it is the only thing that feels comfortable to her; The only thing that feels familiar. It's not drugs, it's depression and fear. They pump through her veins and give her enough energy to "live another day". Pain screams at her through her reflection and she can see herself changing physically; her eyes look so sad no matter how much make up she puts on them. The memories won't go away, the thought of "what she should've done" screams in her head and pierces her ears. She doesn't look at anyone the same anymore. The only one who sees her is her puppy. He is the thread that is holding her weight up. He keeps the shadows away and he locks the monster in his cage temporarily. But when he isn't around, she hears the silence, sees the darkness, feels the venom circulating through her body as she consumes herself into total desolation.