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Is it right to talk to someone you once loved?

I had an argument with my partner last night and I thought it was done. It got me thinking about looking up people I used to have in my life.
I searched all manner of places for some people but I couldn't find them. But one I did find I text and they replied back. What's worse is that that person was my perfect match and we used to get on like a house on fire. The problem was that we were on different sides of the pond and she was living with someone when we talked.
Even so we spoke on video call 6 hrs a day for months. Then he found out and we stopped talking. Life eventually went on and 9 years passed. Now she does follow me on Insta but we didn't have any communication. But last night she did respond via another social media platform to me and I wonder if it is possible to rekindle something? Or is it just an impossible dream.
Maybe me going through an old laptop earlier in the week and seeing pictures of her started me thinking. All my current partner wanted me to do was get rid of pictures relating to my second marriage. Maybe it stirred something?

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RubySoo · 56-60, F

Is she single now?

VirginMatchmaker · 46-50, M

@RubySoo possibly?

RubySoo · 56-60, F

@VirginMatchmaker dont try to rekindle anything unless you are both free to persue it.
Unless you can 100% be sure its only friendship.....but it does appear from your wording you would be happy with just that......
If shes still with the same guy.....dont go there as if and when he finds out, its likely to be the end of her marriage.
(speaking from experience)

VirginMatchmaker · 46-50, M

@RubySoo no her marriage is over. She's just text me about what's been going on. Tbh I think she's happy to talk to someone.
No intention of starting anything unless I'm free and single.

RubySoo · 56-60, F

@VirginMatchmaker
How will yr other half react to knowing you are chatting with an ex?
Tread carefully hunni for all yr sakes. X

VirginMatchmaker · 46-50, M

@RubySoo honestly she'd go mentally. Even if I get. Single texts off my son's mother causes a meltdown. I'm definitely going to tread carefully. I never thought I'd speak to her again and then she responds to me. Maybe I do have rose tinted glasses on when it comes to her. But I can't really start something with her while being in a relationship. Although in reality we were both in long term relationships when we first started talking all those years ago. I guess that's what EP did to us lol.

RubySoo · 56-60, F

@VirginMatchmaker EP brought you together....rhe rest was up to the two of you! Dont see her as an option out of what you have now.
Sounds like 'unfinished business' to me.
Been there....

VirginMatchmaker · 46-50, M

@RubySoo It's definitely unfinished business on my part. I know she's the type to just move on and not go back to the past. But honestly I've no idea what she thinks when talking to me. I know the conversation seems to flow as it always did. She isn't a way out of where I am right now. But she maybe an option in the future if we could ever figure the pond bit out lol.

RubySoo · 56-60, F

@VirginMatchmaker 'an option' oooh.....i doubt she'd want to be considered 'an option'.
I was an option once....and found out i was actually one of 4 options!! He didnt choose me.....thank feck!!!

VirginMatchmaker · 46-50, M

@RubySoo I think option is a poor choice of words lol. For me there is very much unfinished business. All I can think about is starting something back up with her! I've known for a while I don't want to be in the relationship I'm in but leaving and going solo is scary as hell. I think it's the only reason I've not left.

RubySoo · 56-60, F

@VirginMatchmaker going solo is scary...racing headlong into something new (or recycled as the case may be) is silly....and you know it.
I think maybe because its unfinished business and you never got to actually be with her before, you are hankering that lost chance. Ive been there. But sort out your current situation so you are free to exploy sonething new with your old flame, not try to grab back hold if what it once was. You are not the same people niw as you were then and you need to start afresh, not chance reheating something thats been in storage for so long. X

VirginMatchmaker · 46-50, M

@RubySoo yeah my situation has to be resolved sooner rather than later. As my latest post shows. I can't win so maybe it's time to go. You are of course right about not doing something right now.