Can you tell me a FUNNY/CLEAN Joke?

A horse walked into a bar, and the bartender said "why the long face"

A guy was walking to a bar and on his way he found a girl tied up to the railroad tracks. He untied her and they had sex. Guy gets to the bar, friends ask why he's so late, tells them about the girl he found and all the different positions they fucked in. Friends give him props and ask if he got head, guy replies "I couldn't find it."

Wife says to her programmer husband, "Go to the store and buy a loaf of bread. If they have eggs, buy a dozen."
Husband returns with 12 loaves of bread.

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What did the tie say to the hat?

You go on a-head, i'll just hang around.

"Myzery" walks into a bar with a pair of jumper cables over her shoulder, the bartender says, "I'll serve you but don't start anything."

This should be the new way of doing justice. "You're charged with murder? Tell me a cute wholesome joke and you walk".

Unfortunately for agrophobics, there's a cure just round the corner

I think the naughty people has better sense of humor usually 😁

What happened to the frog thst was illegally parked ?

What's the fastest cake in the world?
Scone 🙄🤐

Q. What's red and smells like blue paint?
A. Red paint.

How do you get a pikey to take a bath : Leave it in your front garden