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I Snapped

R.I.P. Self-Esteem

- So, yeah. Here I am again, dear EP (he said, sarcastically).

Mood of the day.... jealous and sad. Very, on the both ends.

I think I lost it yesterday. Someone I care about was in pain. Yet again. And I couldn't find the words to send her. Yet again. And then I saw other friends. Also in pain. And the words wouldn't come.

Yet again.

I posted a story in the group "I Want You to Tell Me the Truth Even If It Hurts Me". I was spitting flames and stuff at everyone. Like I'm some entitled bullshit prince or something.
And I came THIS CLOSE to deleting this account. But I couldn't turn my back on my only friends in the world.

I let all of you down. I couldn't keep my promise to you. Any of you.

Some friend I turned out to be.

You deserve better. So much better than me. You are my only light in this dark world. But some things never change. I can't live without your light, even if it burns me.

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ArnoldJRimmer

i like and accept you as you are. we all have flaws and limitations. when you write like this you do a credible job of showing your feelings..its when you are on the spot you feel that slip away as you try to weild emotions as a surgeons scalpel to expunge others pain. but emotions are mist and smoke. grasping leaves nothing but frustration. letting it flow is what will serve....those who know you understand and appreciate your efforts. dont give up on yourself because we also are not giving up on you

themanoflegends · 36-40, M

And what about those that don't know me?

ArnoldJRimmer

we cannot heal everyone, even as we beat ourselves up because we wish we could.

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