I Want A Realtionship
Random thoughts about three main axioms of an effective relationship.
Trust - This has to be the implicit and explicit bedrock of the relationship. The relationship must be a union of too individuals committed to each other's needs. It has to be understood that they can rely on each pother always.
With so many struggles in life you need to know that you're partner will be there for you and always act with your needs in mind.
I have so often failed at this being unable to prioritize anyone's needs above my own. Being so exhausted that I can barely take care of myself let alone make room for the needs of someone else. You have to have those reserves of energy.
Honesty - Without this no relationship can function on any level. It can seem obvious but actually maintaining this can be exceptionally difficult. It is so easy to hide your feelings or not say what you really think in order to avoid an argument or to keep the peace.
It is very easy to put someone else's needs before your own and end up pretending you are happy when you're not. When times are tough and people have so many commitments it's is often easier to pretend you are happy than to be honest and say what's on your mind.
Understanding - If you can't understand each other then there is no way for either of you to act in accordance to each other's needs. This is why honesty is so important if the other person doesn't know who you are then they cannot give you what you need.
This mean that understanding yourself is very important. If you don't understand your own needs then how can you expect anyone else be expected to?
Communication - It is very important not only that you understand yourself and have to the desire to help each other but you have to be able to effectively communicate. It is no good knowing what you want and desiring to speak the truth if the two of you cannot effectively communicate these ideas.
You may even need to establish rules of communication. You have to take steps to ensure that you know you are capable of understanding each other.
Trust - This has to be the implicit and explicit bedrock of the relationship. The relationship must be a union of too individuals committed to each other's needs. It has to be understood that they can rely on each pother always.
With so many struggles in life you need to know that you're partner will be there for you and always act with your needs in mind.
I have so often failed at this being unable to prioritize anyone's needs above my own. Being so exhausted that I can barely take care of myself let alone make room for the needs of someone else. You have to have those reserves of energy.
Honesty - Without this no relationship can function on any level. It can seem obvious but actually maintaining this can be exceptionally difficult. It is so easy to hide your feelings or not say what you really think in order to avoid an argument or to keep the peace.
It is very easy to put someone else's needs before your own and end up pretending you are happy when you're not. When times are tough and people have so many commitments it's is often easier to pretend you are happy than to be honest and say what's on your mind.
Understanding - If you can't understand each other then there is no way for either of you to act in accordance to each other's needs. This is why honesty is so important if the other person doesn't know who you are then they cannot give you what you need.
This mean that understanding yourself is very important. If you don't understand your own needs then how can you expect anyone else be expected to?
Communication - It is very important not only that you understand yourself and have to the desire to help each other but you have to be able to effectively communicate. It is no good knowing what you want and desiring to speak the truth if the two of you cannot effectively communicate these ideas.
You may even need to establish rules of communication. You have to take steps to ensure that you know you are capable of understanding each other.
36-40, M
