I Am Not A Big Fan Of Humans
Raised That Way... My father is one of the most anti-social people I have ever met. As a kid, I always took my fathers' opinion on everything as truth. So i thought, if he is avoiding people, he must be doing so for a reason. I had a very traumatic childhood, so I turned out to believe everyone is out to hurt and break you.
Now I'm older, and I have to suddenly figure out how to de-program myself from this way of thinking. I am supposed to go out into the world, but it is becoming harder and harder because of the negative perception I have of all people.
I try to tell myself that only certain people are like that, that I can judge all on account of a few. But it never lasts, as soon as I see someone looking at me or laughing, I immediately assume they are evil and laughing at me. I know how pathetic that must sound, but it is harder than one might think to de-brainwash yourself.
Is there anyone else out there who was also raised to fear people?
Now I'm older, and I have to suddenly figure out how to de-program myself from this way of thinking. I am supposed to go out into the world, but it is becoming harder and harder because of the negative perception I have of all people.
I try to tell myself that only certain people are like that, that I can judge all on account of a few. But it never lasts, as soon as I see someone looking at me or laughing, I immediately assume they are evil and laughing at me. I know how pathetic that must sound, but it is harder than one might think to de-brainwash yourself.
Is there anyone else out there who was also raised to fear people?
31-35, F