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I Feel Guilty

I feel guilty of things like listening to those I should never have listened to, and put up with those I never should've had to.

I should already be in the military and even the police force right now, and instead, I am living with the guilt of what is not my fault, let alone my doing. My dad, being the embodiment of it all, should really be blaming himself and admitting it was his fault and all of it, and instead he proclaims his innocence and makes me out to be the bad guy and lied about me of something I didn't do and swear it was true, which is dishonorable. It's like lying on a government form and swearing it was true. I even know it was a mistake being his son, and him being my father.

Now, I'm planning the betterment ahead for my future generations, all the stuff I said before and so on so on I mentioned in my previous stories. It will happen.

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trackboy · 22-25, M

why would you want to be in the military or police??

SamHarris · 31-35, M

@trackboy So I could make a difference in such. I've read stories, not just on SW, where people who come from broken families and such have often made something of themselves and have excelled in the military and the police force and they continue that tradition with theirs after them through the generations and so on so on. Especially those who went into the military and the police force with their martial arts and their other skills they've had and all. No joke.

trackboy · 22-25, M

@SamHarris you good at martial arts? mma? was you out for wrestling or other sports in high school? many other ways to make a difference. you could be a social worker. or be in the medical fields. be big brother for at risk youth.

SamHarris · 31-35, M

@trackboy I plan to take martial arts one day. But also, I'm planning to become a private detective one day. Read any of my stories I posted, and you'll see how it is no joke at all.

trackboy · 22-25, M

@SamHarris you should take up weightlifting. will make you more confident and healthier as well. and more popular. community college is low coast and can take the classes while living at home so no dorm or meal plan costs.

SamHarris · 31-35, M

@trackboy I do plan to take online internet courses and so on so on. But yes, one day I will become a private detective one day, and own and operate my own detective agency.

trackboy · 22-25, M

@SamHarris well you will want to do weightlifting for that as you will have some scary situations from that line of work. i would think with being able to find stuff online a lot of the detective work is gone now. saw that in one movie. no community college there??

SamHarris · 31-35, M

@trackboy What movie?

trackboy · 22-25, M

@SamHarris i don't remember the name of the movie. but in it the detective said people are now able to do online themselves what he used to do. so his services are not needed as much. ever saw the movie called the maltese falcon? its about the detective sam spade. there were some other sam spade movies made too. many film noir detective movies been made.

SamHarris · 31-35, M

@trackboy I've heard of that one, but I haven't seen it.

trackboy · 22-25, M

@SamHarris from what i saw there is less detective work then there used to be. ready for summer??