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I Hate Being Confused

I'm at a loss...I love my husband dearly...but even after going thru hell in our marriage...we are back to roommates...I'm just a fixture in the house once again.. I want to leave but I am worried about my kids being hurt... my baby would never forgive me...I keep praying...for guidance.... I need to make a decision and ball up and keep to it...
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goodboi
Oh dear, if I could hug you I would.. I know how it feels and its not fun. Hang in there.