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I'll Keep Your Secret

A warning:
This is about her so if you're not interested then stop reading now.

We had another conversation or rather she talked and I listened.
Okay I'm a big boy - I know better.
But she can control my emotions! Outside my face is fairly expressionless but inside I'm giddy one minute then deflated another.
It's crazy it's stupid it's well it's just stupid
I'm holding her secrets she's holding his hand
I hear her confidence her intelligence her fears she hears his voice
I see her smile her eyes she sees his face
I mean this is just stupid
I'm a fool this can't happen because she needs him he needs her they're good for each other I'm not her kind of guy she needs someone like him
I know I keep saying I'll stop talking about her and I really will
This is just stupid

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Azuriela · 46-50, F

@island Sucks to be friendzoned but the way I see it every lock has the right key. If the combination doesn't fit , it is fault of neither lock nor key but a waste of everyone's time to continuously try to make it somehow work rather than searching for the correct combination. The remainder of the poem seems to contradict the line " she needs someone like him ". If that's the case , why does she come to you to meet her emotional needs instead of him ?

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xTutu7x · F

Well this is a place for you to vent out your frustrations. Don't feel bad for talking about it. Sometimes it helps to express your feelings about things in order to feel better or move on. Sorry you're dealing with this.

SW-User

[c=#4C0073]It's not stupid when the heart feels so deeply. It is what it is. I hope you can overcome this, .. but if this was just a poem, nice one :)[/c]

CallmeHopelessNotRomantic · 46-50, F

Aww we can't see things logically with our heart. Especially if you're too loyal to the person.

Sunscape99 · 51-55, F

You're in love with a woman who's in love with another man yet only considers you her safe place.

My advice? Get out while you can. I understand she's your friend but...this shit will end up crushing you if you aren't careful. She's already able to control your emotions pretty much says you are already in too deep.

Much peace to you. Love yourself first.

SW-User

Island: It is okay to search for your own happiness.
Waiting around for someone to leave you, how is that good? I have been there.
I kept hoping my husband would see the light and change, but it never happened.
The scariest decision I ever made was to go on without him.

Sunscape99 · 51-55, F

Well, being 100+ years old could make one a little antsy in wondering when said person will appear😉

Just go with what I said. Sometimes it takes another person to point out the obvious to us.

SW-User

You just need to move on Island. To find someone who needs you. Continuing this self-torture cannot be good for you. I wish you the best.

WiltingRose · 26-30, F

I think I talked to you before about her. I will always say this to you, Island: Think about what you deserve!

SW-User

Azuriela, I realize the contradiction. We've been friends for a long time and that's simply how it is and will always be.
(Yeah you're right - it does suck)
I'm saying she needs someone like him because I know we'll never be anything more than friends - it's a cross between reminding myself and convincing myself.

As far as it being a poem I can assure you that was a pure accident . I don't have a poetic bone in my body.
Thank you.

Deleted4ever · 100+, F

Oh my sweet friend, we all have our "this is just stupid" moments. Your heart doesn't care though. As stupid, agonizing, hurtful or heartbreaking that some moments/actions can be, I personally wouldn't trade any of them. I want to feel it all and embrace everyone of life's stings, even if only to grow as a mere being. (((hugs)))

SW-User

Island: Be a friend by all means, but still look for your own happiness as well.
I honestly understand you, because I am a brooder,too.
But, it causes me much pain and I always hope people can do better than I do with it. :(
I find writing helps for me.
I get it out and let it go and if I pick it back up again, then I write some more.

SW-User

Rae, I'm proud of you for doing that.

I'm her friend. It's my fault for letting my guard down. It was a weak moment. Like I said, I know the rules-I'm a adult and I know this is how it'll always be.
It's a matter of taking deep breaths and being the friend she needs.

SW-User

Rae, thanks.
I just have to keep in mind eventually she won't need me; they'll go on with their life together and that will be that!
I also have to keep in mind my role in this, and stay in my place.

Sunscape99 · 51-55, F

But I love the fact that you are a man and not afraid to write about and or show your emotions and feelings.

You will be the love of one lucky lady's life one day.

Azuriela · 46-50, F

@island Being in love does tend to inspire poetry. What do you mean by someone like him ? How is someone "like him" different than someone "like you" ?

SW-User

Fantabulous40, I don't write poetry because I don't have a sense for it.
This is my observation.
Thank you for your reply

Fantabulous · 46-50, F

"i'm holding her secrets, she'said holding his hand" ...oh my word that line just made my eyes leak 😢 ...how sad!

SW-User

Sunscape99, thank you.
I have to let my brain take control so I can still be her friend and her escape.

SW-User

Hippie guy, she's my friend and she needs someone who'll listen.
I'm that friend and I can't let her down

SW-User

Island: If it is only to get rid of the pain, I think that totally acceptable.
I keep everything.

SW-User

Rae, that is a good outlet. I write what I need to then either delete it or shred it.

SW-User

Epic - thanks but as you know that's part of these things called emotions

sspec

Some day, you'll get another topic to write about. Vast Universe!
Take care.

SW-User

island: Not so sure about that, but I do try to be compassionate.

SW-User

WiltingRose no it's not a poem.
This is really happening

SStarfish ·

Welcome.. Sorry you are feeling all that stuffs :(

SW-User

I think you are wonderful!
🙂

WiltingRose · 26-30, F

Is this a poem or...? (So sorry)

SW-User

Azuriela, even though I'm one who believes in age being simply a number (of course both have to be at least legal age) I wouldn't want to burden her with a guy my age. Plus one only has to see the look in her eyes when she talks about him or sees him to know how she feels about him.

SW-User

Thank you @graessparrow.
Hugs back.

SW-User

Tutu, thank you very much.

SW-User

Rae you're wonderful

SW-User

Epic: thank you. Hugs.

SW-User

Rowena, thank you.

xTutu7x · F

You're welcome!

SStarfish ·

Hugs..

SW-User

WiltingRose, you may have talked to me before.
Thank you.

SW-User

Sunscape99, thanks.
However I'm not holding my breath.

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SW-User

That's very true.

SW-User

Callme you're right

SW-User

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