I've always said that I'm "best in small doses". I now have a friend group that I've known for quite some time and I feel ourselves growing apart because they've known me for too long. I've slowly been changing myself to be more reliable and kinda... Not so... I dunno... Something. And it has helped a little, but honestly that's just making me hate myself and I'm not really sure where to go from here.
The reason I'm "best in small doses" is because I have wildly different things I like to do, including nothing, and although I basically have a plan in my head, it's really hard for other people to know what I'm going to be doing whenever they see me.
If you were to join me on any random day and time, we'd have fun together. But more than a few hours and you won't be able to be prepared for whatever crazy thing has floated through my mind. I kinda knew it was coming and got myself ready to go... But other people... "oh so we were sitting down watching a movie, and in the middle of it, you just get up and leave for 3 hours? Wtf?"
Yeah. You guys were having fun and I didn't want to bother you, but I noticed we were out of popcorn and beer, so I ran to get some. While I was out, I remembered the dry cleaning for the event tomorrow and the place was about to close so I stopped there. When I started my car to leave, it had a misfire, so I had to go to the car parts store and figure out what the heck was going on with that.
The only reason I even left was because you leaned over and asked me if we had popcorn and beer and I said I'll run to the store and get some. It was gonna be 15 minutes but that's just never how it actually works.
That's why I don't involve people in my life past a certain point.. But now it's getting harder to keep that distance