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I’m in a weird mood

Anxiety about the future hardly ever goes away anymore. Lately my stomach has been upset and I haven’t slept well.

Usually I say I want to rewind all the way back in my life, and do it over again - knowing what I know now. But right at this moment, I want to rewind back to 2012 - and stay there. 2012 was the last good year. Were the Mayans right?

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Carissimi · 70-79, F

Sorry to hear this, Kat. I wish I could give you some hope and optimism, but I’m just getting through each day as best as I can. Is it the pandemic?

SmartKat · 56-60, F

@Carissimi I think the pandemic is just making my natural anxiety worse.

I just feel like I can never relax anymore. So many bad things have happened (to me personally, and in the world in general) that I’m always thinking, “What’s next?” and I’m scared that whatever is next can only be bad. The last time I felt really safe and secure was 2012. I’m wondering if I’ll ever be able to relax and not be anxious about the future again.

Carissimi · 70-79, F

I’m like that too, but I managed to quell most of my anxiety, most of the time. Not sure how I did that. I think I just became so tired of emotional upheavals that I had to make my peace of mind my main priority. I think I grew exhausted from worry and anxiety that I just organically reached a “whatever” point for most things. It took decades to get to it for me. I hope you can find your ease much sooner. 🤗💕 @SmartKat