I Hate Asking For Help

Serious sides of things #02: I reached the end of the rope and think i'm going to start seeing a counselor. I contacted my doctor and just felt desperate enough to ask for help and quit trying to deal with things by myself. I don't want to hurt myself again.
Its a big step forward but I've been feeling like my presence on this earth is unjustified. I have good days...and then i have bad days but the bad days are starting to outweigh the good days. I'm just frustrated, unhappy and feel like someone just threw me in a hole and took the ladder out. I'm tired of faking a smile or avoiding everybody.