I Am Nobody Special

I Am The Opposite Actually...
Here is who I am
You may think I want pitty
But that is not true
I am just being honest
My name is Philip Gabriel Spector
I am 17 year old
I am currently in a continuation school
After I attempted suicide they at the hospital said I was hearing voices
I was
But it wasn't and is not that bad
I was asked plenty of times at my rehab facilitiy if I was
I said no everytime
I do not believe in anything
I do not know what to believe in
I have no personality
I have trouble communicating with others
I do horrible at school
I have burned myself
But I deserve far worse
I have broken 2 serious laws
I should be in prison right now
I wear a hood and hat at school
I do not like anyone to see me
But I want communication
I want friends
But I do not take that step
I am holding on to 1 thing
Once she leaves me my life will end
I am Philip Gabriel Spector
I am nothing
I am nobody special

mynewhate · 31-35, M

I know completely what you are saying, I used to have what I considered "friends" but I was really an idiot back then I couldn't trust them with anything and they were just using me. So I have trouble trusting others, this goes along with the fact of how I feel about myself. And how she humiliated me. I think there are certain people that were bragging about what they went through at my rehab facility I was forced to go too and it just made me sick. They thought just because someone did this to them they were better than anyone else.

I want a friend I can count on more than anything. To be there for me when I am struggling and when I am happy.

mynewhate · 31-35, M

Well the person I was told this by hated me and for good reason we had a class together and we forced to sit together it was weird as f***. But she told me this and she had no right to judge me after everything she put me through.

ok thanks, practically no one listens to me so I know what you mean by that

Cherokeej

I understand exactly how you feel. And i just wanna say that no one not even you should go threw that, your story really touch my heart because i can relate to it and i know what it feels like to be alone but if you need a friend im here for you.