I Am Lonley

My ex husband of 15 years left our 4 kids and me 3 years ago. I have a pain illness that means I have to use a walking stick when I'm out. He spent years knocking my confidence telling me I was a "old ugly cripple who no one would ever want". Since then I've found it hard not to feel that he is/Was right. I feel like my illness defines me and that it will be the only thing people see. So I tend to lock myself away which compounds the feelings of isolation and loneliness.