I Need Therapy

[big]Session 20: Getting to the heart of the matter in a heartbeat[/big]

"We can't gain much traction when you don't come regularly?"
"I know... I guess."
"Well, I'm not going to lecture you... what is bothering you?"
"I don't know... I guess it's the same old thing. I'm so unrelatable; I can't connect with others. I feel so isolated."
"Well, these are things you have expressed before. What have you done to confront these issues? What tools have you used?"
"Tools...?"
"Come on, we've been through this before. I'm not going to coax you into expressing yourself..."
"I guess I haven't done anything, then."
"Well, how do YOU feel about your progress?"
"Not very good, I guess."
"Tell me what's going on. I want to hear about it."
"I see how easy it is for other people to engage with each other. People seem interested in each other. No one is interested in me. I'm always the outsider. My heart reaches out to people and it always gets broken, I guess. No one wants me. At least that's how it feels."
"What do you think is holding you back? What is it that has been holding you back all this time... that still is holding you back?"
"I don't know... I guess I'm afraid."
"Afraid of what?"
"I just feel like we have been through all this already... I'm not making any progress... I won't be making any progress... I can't seem to make any progress. Alright...?"
"No... it's not alright. You refuse to accept the progress you have made... you do have people you talk to, right?"
"Yes. Kind of..."
"You do effortlessly engage in conversations, right?"
"Yes, I guess."
"But, now you want more and you have hit a roadblock..."
"Yeah."
"So, you need to push past the block so you can keep going; so you can continue with your journey."
"I can't..."
"But, you can. [b]Never underestimate the relatability of your pain.[/b] I'm not suggesting you wear your heartache on your sleeve, but you need to get over yourself thinking you are the only one who is experiencing it. In fact, it's a bit narcissistic to think you are."
"Yeah, well..."
"Listen, you are hiding so much and until you are ready to release and reveal all that you are hiding, you are not going to get the sense of fulfillment you want. You seem to have this idea that your sense of self-worth is going to come from engaging with others. But, that's just a deception your mind is using to give yourself a free pass to continue acting as if you are an innocent bystander. You need to become a more active participant in your life instead of acting like you are mindlessly going along for the ride. That's the secret; that's where your self-worth will come from. It's where your self-worth is waiting for you."
"Why are you being so mean?"
"I'm not being mean; I'm being brutally honest with you. You need to get over your fear of rejection and put yourself out there. Instead of waiting for people to approach you, you need to approach others. I know, for you, it's hard work. [b]But, hard work does work."[/b]
"Yeah, I guess."
"Not exactly the reaction I was hoping for, but it could have been worse... And... there's the eye-roll."
"[Sigh]"
"Look... Stop obsessing over what everyone else is doing and how you think it is so easy for everyone else and just put effort into your own actions. And, don't worry about getting rejected. People, including you and covering everyone, recover from rejection [b]in a heartbeat[/b]."
"Yeah, but..."
"So, pick yourself up no matter how beat-up and battered you feel. I think you know what you need to do. Stop acting like you don't. And, come back and tell me what you have done - even if you fail. It's okay to fail. It's not okay to keep on feeling sorry for yourself."