Ladies, how is staring at a guy making the first move?

These days a lot of women consider staring at a guy they're interested in as "making the first move". Why don't women like to approach men these days, but rather just stare at them. I could be wrong here, they may be staring at men for different reasons as well. My question to women is why do most just stare and never approach?

Things could be different depending on where you live. Here in NYC many (not all) women want status and validation. They just stare at a guy to see if they will look back and check them out. I feel social media has a lot to do with it. Many (not all) women try too hard to be like instagram models/influencers. They don't realize their just as pretty if not prettier than women they try to be like. Social media is just Smokes and Mirrors. Then again I could be wrong.

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Adaydreambeliever · 56-60, F

ok so.. while in theory women have just as much right and ability to make the first move... it's also true that some men don't like that.. and it's also true that because this is relatively new for women, (i.e. people of my generation were taught we have to wait for a man to ask.. so it's hard to buck that nurture that was instilled)

You make an interesting point re social media and wanting to look like models... because it is also true that quite a few young women are very, very insecure about their looks.. they have been raised in a time when there are so many pressures re how we look.. so again this will affect their confidence and ability to make the first move.. if, as a young woman you feel you are not pretty enough.. not slim enough, not perfect enough.. then you are hardly going to have confidence to make the first move with a guy you like.. see?

kydflash · 31-35, M

@Adaydreambeliever Thank you, I really appreciate it. I see and understand what your saying. Good to hear from a Women's perspective, that's why I asked the question, to get a better understanding on the situation.

Nining · F

Men should make the first move, approach the woman he likes.

Its tradition, normal, woman sit pretty and wait to see if men are interested in her.

Staring. No, if I really like some man I not stare at him, I feel too embarrassed , confused and shy.

I just wish he come to me...

JarJarBoom · 41-45, F

In my mind, I think men should really make the first bold move. It doesn't seem much like a rejection if you just stare at someone and then they don't approach you.

kydflash · 31-35, M

@JarJarBoom I agree that for the most part, Men should make the first move. But sometimes when Women stare at a guy, the guy is unaware.

Bubbles · 36-40, F

Your opinion of women is a bit off.

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Bubbles · 36-40, F

@kydflash Well I will start with your first sentence

[quote]These days a lot of women consider staring at a guy they're interested in as "making the first move". [/quote]

How did you come to this conclusion? Have you done some poll of all women that are staring? Saying this opinion as a definitive statement is the issue. In my life, for example, if there was someone I was interested in, I may look at him, but would do it secretly. I stare at people who have peeked my curiosity, usually to be honest in a bad way...a strange outfit, they are doing something weird, etc.

kydflash · 31-35, M

@Bubbles Thanks for the feedback and explaining the different reasons why you may stare, it's greatly appreciated. Per my first sentence, back in College we actually did a school wide poll and 65% of the Women considered staring as making the first move.

JesseInTX · 51-55, M

Exactly @Bubbles. A look is one thing. Staring is a WTF is going on here moment.

A first move is, “I checked you out slyly, I think I caught you being sly. I walk up and say, hey I’m Jesse, what’s your name”

SW-User

Lol. Reminds me of this woman here at work who stares at me with a horrified look, as if I was some sort of bulbous and vile eldritch monstrosity that fell down from the depths of a demented space 😹

xixgun · M

I always think when people stare they are doing that, "let the mind run free" thing; and don't actually see anyone. They just happen to be facing a particular direction.

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