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I Am Grieving

I think one of the hardest parts about grieving is that you become the "weird kid who eats glue" sitting alone in the back. Life has come to a screeching halt and everyone else around you is zooming along. Strangely there is comfort in that, because while you want people to care you simultaneously want them to leave you alone. C.S. Lewis once described it (upon the death of his wife) that he wants people around but wishes they would talk between themselves and not to him. My heart is full of contradictions. I distract myself with "normal" things then spend the rest of time remembering that nothing feels normal and that I'm really stumbling around pretending I know what I am doing.
-Raven
Dusty101 · F
Grief is like the ocean... it comes on waves ebbing and flowing. Sometimes the water is calm, and sometimes it is overwhelming. All we can do is learn to swim.

Someone wrote this to me... and it's so true... I'm so sorry you're grieving 😢
ravenwind43 · 51-55, F
@Dusty101 Yes you described it perfectly, that is very true. TY...I want my son back...for my benefit not his, because I don't want him back to suffer. :(
Dusty101 · F
@ravenwind43 my heart is with you. And I completely understand what you said. No parent should lose a child. 😢
ravenwind43 · 51-55, F
@Dusty101 ((hug)) ty very much
Highonheels · 51-55, M
I pretty much know how you feel , I’m suffering from severe depression and I feel like no one really understands me or even cares , I feel like I’m all alone in this battle for my life , just to get a hint of my life back , my dad thinks that if I get a job it will solve all my problems but unfortunetly there’s more to what’s bothering me than just my financial life I mean that’s part of it yea but there’s my social life 3, my love life 0 , my sex life 0, my personal life 4, these are 1-10 ratings so there all pretty much on the low side obviously plus all the problems within those aspects of my life it’s like I want to have a life but then sometimes it doesn’t really matter I know it sounds strange right
lasergraph · 70-79, M
As unique individuals our grief is just as unique. There is no RIGHT way to grieve we all do it different.
Highonheels · 51-55, M
@lasergraph true very true
ravenwind43 · 51-55, F
@lasergraph Yes indeed
Highonheels · 51-55, M
Normal is what you personally define as normal at any given time , so right now for you this is your normal , don’t worry about what others consider normal for them because it’s not really about them it’s about “you” and how “you” are dealing with “your“ grieving process that’s what matters most right.
Peaches · F
God bless you, 😔💙sometimes being alone is a good thing. By now I hope you are coping better with his leaving. I say it this way because I know you will see him again.💕
ravenwind43 · 51-55, F
@Peaches I am struggling...esp because it's near the one year anniversary. The grief is not as intense but still present. Thank you for writing. ((hug))
Peaches · F
@ravenwind43 I can understand that. [i][b][c=#7700B2]HUGS💓[/c][/b][/i]
Just love yourself. There is a side of you awakening. Embrace it!
ravenwind43 · 51-55, F
@RenaissanceMan I already know I am strong, but grief takes time...that is how it goes.
@ravenwind43 I understand. I've had my share too.
Highonheels · 51-55, M
@ravenwind43 grief is a tough enemy for sure but your stronger and you will get through it , as fantabulous said one day at a time that’s all you can do
Fantabulous · 46-50, F
There is no right or wrong way in dealing with such a loss, just one day at a time doing whatever it is thats helps you get through.
Strength and love to you xoxo
ravenwind43 · 51-55, F
Highonheels · 51-55, M
Ike every time I start building on one of those aspects it falls right back apart I can’t seem to build up a permanent structure of life
ravenwind43 · 51-55, F
@Highonheels I wish you better things.
Highonheels · 51-55, M
@ravenwind43 thank you as I do you I hope things soon turn around for you and that you may find peace
SW-User
I can’t even imagine what normal feels like to you.

Take your time and don’t worry what others think.

I am so sorry for your loss.
ravenwind43 · 51-55, F
@SW-User I will have to discover a new normal as time goes on, and thank you.
NewKidInTown · 51-55, M
I like the weird kid that eats glue. But let's put the glue down now and have something healthy :)
ravenwind43 · 51-55, F
@NewKidInTown ((hug))
JustNik · 51-55, F
ravenwind43 · 51-55, F
@JustNik TY Nik:)
Highonheels · 51-55, M
Just thank god for each and every day that he gives you , you will get stronger and stronger with each passing day it just takes time that’s all
MartinTheFirst · 26-30, M
I feel like that right now, the kid eating glue. 😂

 
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