OK, so I have a couple of issues, mostly arising from my unfamiliarity with the Brass Scorpion. Firstly, why does the cannon get 10 shots? Personally, I'd use the damage table to modify the number of attacks it has, or what it hits on or something, because that thing is crazy powerful. Secondly, you don't need to put an asterisk next to damage value of the Bombard. Thirdly, the Runes of the Blood God rule might be better written as:
When the Brass Scorpion is targeted by a spell, friend or foe (excluding Blood Blessings), the caster suffers D6 Mortal Wounds.
You also forgot to state how many Brass Scorpions make up a unit (I know it's one, but still) and what it's equipped with in the first paragraph.
Finally, I envy your ability to make warscrolls like that; I can never figure that sort of thing out.