i float through a world that will never know what it's like to have multiple personalities. luckily, we have found a love that does. but for me, it is not so simple. no one craves to love me. but i crave to love him. with his warm eyes. i watch secretly, hiding behind the eyes of his love. why must no one want to know me? i know that talking is hard for me, but i can still be present. it's hard to be alone. but i was created this way. i was born to suffer in silence. to pick us up and keep us functioning. i know how to be alone. i was born alone. i just wish someone would want to know me. i know the other alters are more "out there" but i have a nice personality, I'm sweet, i'm thoughtful, i'm very connected to people. i like to think that i appreciate people more because i'm alone almost all of the time. i just wish someone wanted me. -f
Hello. I too suffer from D.I.D., but I am working on integration. I have had a longing most of my life for someone to be interested in me and getting to know me, the real me. Recently I realized that perhaps it was me who needed to be interested in me...I let that thought marinate and finally got interested in me and now I am working on becoming a better me, a whole me and that is a pretty powerful thing. I don't think anyone is born this way, it is how the brain reacts to trauma that we can't handle, to protect us from the trauma. I think it is an amazing thing that my mind did. I don't remember the 1st 11 years of my life except for a handful of memories. I know that I may remember at some time, and I am okay with that, I need to allow myself to have the feelings associated with those memories. I accept myself and think I am an amazing person with an amazing mind and what happened to me did not kill me because of it. I hope anything I have said here today can help you view yourself just a little differently because your mind is as beautiful as mine and it protected you when no one else was there to do so. I will pray for you to first be interested in getting to know yourself...
