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I Thought Of You Today

I Thought of You Today.

It has been more than 21 years since I walked away.
I had good excuses as to why I walked but excuses were all they were.
The true reason is shameful.
The true reason was because I was weak.

I could not give you up and I could not claim you.
I was trapped by societal norms.
Shackled and afraid to gnaw off my hand for the sake of freedom.

So I walked away.

I put you onto some dusty high corner in a forlorn closet of my mind.
Never forgotten but seldom recalled.
Until today.

Today, while with old friends, someone mentioned having seen you.

And there you were.

No longer in a forlorn closet but in the front parlor of my mind.
There you were.
You sparkling eyes.
Your smile.
Your lilt.
Your laughter.

And I remembered.

The warmth of you in my arms.
The softness of your lips.
The passion of your soul.

And now, how will I ever return you to that place of exile?
I was too weak to claim you then.
I am too weak to forget you now.

I thought of you today.
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SmartKat · 56-60, F
Wow, so sad and also so beautiful.