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I Thought Of You Today

I Thought of You Today.

It has been more than 21 years since I walked away.
I had good excuses as to why I walked but excuses were all they were.
The true reason is shameful.
The true reason was because I was weak.

I could not give you up and I could not claim you.
I was trapped by societal norms.
Shackled and afraid to gnaw off my hand for the sake of freedom.

So I walked away.

I put you onto some dusty high corner in a forlorn closet of my mind.
Never forgotten but seldom recalled.
Until today.

Today, while with old friends, someone mentioned having seen you.

And there you were.

No longer in a forlorn closet but in the front parlor of my mind.
There you were.
You sparkling eyes.
Your smile.
Your lilt.
Your laughter.

And I remembered.

The warmth of you in my arms.
The softness of your lips.
The passion of your soul.

And now, how will I ever return you to that place of exile?
I was too weak to claim you then.
I am too weak to forget you now.

I thought of you today.
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Raffie · 61-69, F
"Too weak to claim you" says it all. If only you
were strong enough to take that leap so many years ago, we could have ended the tale with "a passion for the ages".