I Hate Men Who Hit Women

SoFine...

A little more serious here. The only men I know to hit women were doing it out of their own inneffectual rage and probably shame.

I'm not wanting to "blame the victim" at all here, but some of those men watched their *fathers* be abused (usually only verbally) by their *mothers*... and probably were the victims of the same wicked tongue themselves. Of course, it was as likely as not that *their* fathers probably were vicious to them or *their* mothers!

The cycle of abuse is hard to stop. I made the decision about the time my daughters were 2 and 4 to break the cycle of abuse their mother had been part of, which was "matrilineal".

Their mother fought viciously with *her* mother (who fought viciously with *her* mother)... when she (openly, in front of me) threatened to "slap your faces" to my daughters, I vowed I would do all I could to keep her from passing that on down.

We were divorced about 2 years later and I was the primary parent/caregiver after that (and before)... it cost me a lot financially and professionally (as many women accept as single parents) to do this, but it is well worth it. My younger daughter has a 4 year old daughter now and I have not seen her even come *close* to using verbal (or threats of physical) abuse toward her. Both daughters have managed to become adults without (*much*) fighting with their own mother, though both all but disowned their grandmother.

So, not to move the focus away from male violence against women (I know and agree that it is *much* more common), I want to present the simple fact of the cycle of abuse through generations which may be "handed down" cross-gender or same-gender...

I'm just thankful that I did not have the background or idea that threatening my (ex) wife with violence to curb her violent threats toward our children was a good idea. I've seen that failure as well!

SoFine... i *LOVE* your avatar <grin>..

I got my first black eye from a girl in 1st grade. Actually, we both got a black eye. But it came from a full-tilt collision while racing (in opposite directions) around the school building. We rounded the "opposite corner" at top speed, and being the two tallest kids in class (She was Native American, very beautiful, tall..) and smacko!

I've never been tempted to hit a woman. Or even speak aggressively toward one. My father was a good role model in this, so maybe that is why?

So you say it's women's fault men grow up to be abusive? If only mums would teach them right they would not grow up to beat women? And single mothers bring up violent men?Really???

Hello Hdryder555,
This huge issue needs to be talked about, that is why I question it. Why do indeed men hit women? Can you tell my why then?