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I Am Submissive

Mildly Adult · Notifications: · Newest First
It's been 23 days since my Sir Hubby has passed away. It's 1:23 a.m.... I usually can't fall asleep till after midnight...sometimes till 2 a.m. I cry a whole lot. I got a wonderful dog he's a miniature australian shepherd and I call him my grief therapy dog. I shouldn't be spending lots of money because I'm down to one income and still got bills to pay...but I can't seem to stop buying stuff online or just overspending. I tried to dye my hair purple and blue and it didn't really take, but it did dye my bathroom floor! Tonight I poured a mix of baking soda and peroxide in my hair and now my hair is really red.

I feel out of control, but I just don't know what to do with myself.

Oh, I also made like this real raw video of me just talking/crying and asking some stupid questions about things pertaining to my husband and his death.... so now folks think I'm heading towards a nervous breakdown... I don't know if I am, I don't want to be.

I say stupid stuff too. I don't think I'm right in the head. :'(
46-50, F
12 replies
3 days ago
MrDiegoWolfe · 31-35, M
as a someone who lost an important person Night is easier to stay away to, as the sleep is hard to do.....
realrare · 46-50, F
[@1009693,MrDiegoWolfe] Easier said than done. And I take stuff to help me sleep. I had 3 benedryls, 2 muscle relaxers, a pot pill called Marinol which has a synthetic THC ingredient in it.... yet I'm still awake.
Harriet03 · 36-40, F
So sorry hun.
I remember your posts from the hospital visits etc.
Try & be strong... ✌
quitwhendone · 46-50, M
Oh, I'm so sorry for your loss.
JoyfulSilence · 41-45, M
geoam1 · 51-55, M
I'm sorry to hear about your husband. I know it hurts very much but you have to take care of yourself. He wouldn't want you to be falling apart. I lost my brother just before Thanksgiving and it still hurts. Hugs to you and I hope you can begin to heal.
realrare · 46-50, F
[@100938,geoam1] Thank you
geoam1 · 51-55, M
[@748200,realrare] you're welcome 🤗🤗🤗
QuietEd2019 · 26-30, M
I am really sorry to hear about your husband 😔 I am sure the pain and grief is unimaginable 😔 as Geoam1 said your husband wouldn’t want you to be overwhelmed by grief, if he was here now he would be cheering you up in some way and reassuring you that he is always with you in your heart and that he would love to see you live your life for him and you.
Zenni · F
I'm so sorry sweetheart. Big hugs.
Pfuzylogic · M
You are in the midst of finding your way and making a space for your grief for a wonderful man. As strong as you are, all of this is overwhelming but you still remain a beautiful lady that your husband would want to find peace. Our Lord is there. You are in my heart and mind and I do hope that you find the grace for this season.
Fishing65 · 51-55, M
I was so sorry to hear about your husband I hope life gets better for you I hate seeing you like this I always enjoyed picking at you because you always knew what to say to make me laugh I’m praying for you and I’m here if you need someone to talk to

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