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I Am a Caregiver

My great grandmother has dementia, she often feels the need to stand and then sit over and over again. She also wants us to ‘hurry’ for seemingly no reason. She says she feels fine, her vitals are what they should be and she’s as hydrated as she can be.
The nurses that come to our home don’t have anything to say about it.

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4meAndyou · F

My mother died from dementia. After she died I specialized in the care of Alzheimers and dementia patients.

The brain that is suffering from dementia resembles fine swiss cheese...really. It can weigh as little as half of a normal human brain. The last part of the brain to remain functional is the part that remembers and enjoys music, so if you love your great-grandmother, buy her an Ipod and load it with all the most popular music from when she was about 15 years old. She will really love to listen to it.

As her memory deteriorates, she will still be able to remember perfectly any incident from her childhood and youth, and she will still be able to talk about that.

People with dementia can be emotional, but can sometimes only operate on strong emotions like anger, and they may try to provoke others to anger. Activity such as you mention is also normal in dementia. Try not to make your great-grandmother feel that she is behaving abnormally. A tiny part of her knows that, but she can't control it.

GlitterBug · 26-30, F

Honestly one of the biggest issues we’re facing is that my mom can’t seem to hold her tounge and control her temper. @4meAndyou

4meAndyou · F

@GlitterBug That happens a lot. The families of the afflicted are often much worse, and much more emotional, than the person suffering from the disease. This usually stems from an almost total lack of understanding of what is really going on with the afflicted one. The demented person sometimes deliberately pushes all the buttons she knows will provoke such a response, because that is what they can feel and understand.

GlitterBug · 26-30, F

I’ve been bringing attention it, this is new territory for all of us. My grandmother is not abused by any means but the tone of voice and all matters, we’re all learning how to manage it. There’s a lot of stress and frustration.
@4meAndyou

4meAndyou · F

@GlitterBug You have my sympathies. Please remember to do the Ipod for your great-grandmother. It will calm her, and give her some degree of happiness. When she calms because of the music, your family will calm. Here is an article you will want to ask your mother to read.

https://www.caregiver.org/caregivers-guide-understanding-dementia-behaviors

Remind her that your great-grandmother's brain is probably almost half gone. The brain at this stage usually looks like Swiss cheese and weighs half the amount of a normal brain. When your mother truly understands that she is dealing with this much brain damage, it might help to calm her.

GlitterBug · 26-30, F

Thank you @4meAndyou