Only logged in members can reply and interact with the post.
Join SimilarWorlds for FREE »

Which one is it..

Questioning your sexuality when your already in a heterosexual relationship. Wrong or right is it a form of cheating?
firefall · 61-69, M
Well, on one hand it's only cheating if you do something about it.

On the other hand, if you're truly questioning your sexuality, trying to suppress & deny it, historically has a painfully high cost.
MeInCharge · 41-45, M
Maybe cheating yourself if you don't figure it out.
JarJarBoom · 41-45, F
I don't see how this is even cheating when you are just questioning on what you could be attracted to.
WanderLustChick · 31-35, F
@JarJarBoom well it depends on how far your going to find out what it is..like actually having sex with someone else
JarJarBoom · 41-45, F
@WanderLustChick I mean if you are having sex with somebody else...yea..you are probably cheating. If you are just thinking about it...no
Northwest · M
There are a couple of issues here.

1. Looking outside your relationship. This is a sign that you're not on solid relationship ground. This has nothing to do with your sexuality, unless you got into the relationship in the first place, to prove to yourself that you're heterosexual, but then it's not fair to your partner.

2. Your sexual orientation. Only you can answer that question, but that's independent of #1
WanderLustChick · 31-35, F
@Northwest right that was what I was more trying to get at the fact of someone going outside of the relationship to get an answer. I can't really decide if it's just being dishonest or cheating etc. It's hard
Northwest · M
@WanderLustChick I don't know if it's really that hard. If the question is about you, then you already know that the current relationship is not doing it for you. There could be a lot of reasons, but it seems as if the most critical one, is that you're questioning your sexuality.

Human sexuality is NOT binary, for most of us. It's a scale, from 1 to 10. Those who are 1 or 10, are either homosexual or heterosexual. The rest are "fluid", and the close they are to the center, the easier it is for them to swing in both directions.

This does not meant that they are cheaters, it means that who they end up with (if monogamy is what they want, and we already know that half the population cheated or will cheat), is dependent on the PERSON, not the sex of that person.

With every relationship, there's a lust phase, followed by what should be lust and emotional attachment (personality, common values, empathy, respect, etc).

If what you're feeling is about a particular person (as in one woman in particular), you may be attributing your attraction to her, to a change in your sexual orientation. It's probably not.

If it's about women in general, as in you feel attracted to women in general, and you feel that you need to do something about it, then you may either be on one end of the spectrum, and/or your current relationship does not do it for you (for a combination of other reasons).

Nevertheless, you clearly have an issue here, and the fair thing to do, is to break off your current relationship, before you try to figure out everything else.
SW-User
Not wrong or right, it just is. It's not cheating to wonder about who you are and what you like.
DragonFruit · 61-69, M
Just questioning isn’t cheating. Having sex outside the relationship to try to figure out if you’re gay or bi (unless done with your partner’s consent) would be cheating.
There’s no “wrong or right” to merely questioning.....unless you got into the heterosexual relationship to try to convince someone (maybe even yourself) that you’re not gay.
SW-User
It's not cheating, just dishonest/unfair towards yourself and your partner, since it wasn't what he or she signed up for.
SW-User
Maybe its just a medical situation where you are suffering from something but your brain is looking for something new to cope with it.
SW-User
We are always evolving. Maybe your questioning is you being honest with yourself.
YMITheWayIM · 46-50, M
I don't get the Q.
WanderLustChick · 31-35, F
@YMITheWayIM it's kind of hard to put into words.
dancingtongue · 80-89, M
Nothing wrong in exploration to learn about yourself. To not do so is cheating yourself in the long run. If your partner, in any kind of relationship, is too selfish to understand, it is their problem, not yours.
In between just wondering and actually having sex with other people, online erotic adventures can be a good way for a person to explore who they are and what they desire.
JesseInTX · 51-55, M
I would say if you have a question then you should try it out to be sure. That's just my opinion.
testbutton · 51-55, M
if thinking about something was a bad thing i'd be on the fast track to hell by now..
Mmiker · 46-50, M
Absolutely not. Your sexuality is as important as your existence.
PTCdresser57 · 61-69, M
Not cheating at all.
This comment is hidden. Show Comment
Depends on how you're questioning and how you define cheating.

 
Post Comment